An Angel's Kiss
by JessyeJesigirl
Summary: Brooke Davis is strong, she is amazingly fearless and independant. Brilliant and Beautiful and Brave. that is until she receives an angel's kiss and she begins to break down. Is she alone or are her friends by her side?
1. Owner Of A Lonely Heart

Chapter One- Owner Of A Lonely Heart

"If you want to forget something or someone, never hate it, or never hate him/her. Everything and everyone that you hate is engraved upon your heart; if you want to let go of something, if you want to forget, you cannot hate." C. JoyBell C.

**They were laughing, smiling, as they walked down the road, Unaware that I was watching them. He had his arm around her and she was beaming up at him but for some reason I couldn****'****t find it in me to hate them. I couldn****'****t hate them for being together or for connecting. I coul****dn****'****t hate them for the mistakes they****'****d made or the mistakes I****'****d made. Because if I kept hating them, then I****'****d never move on, I would end up resenting them for the rest of my school year and that wouldn****'****t make me happy. That doesn****'****t make me happy and it****'****s for that reason that I****'****m done. I****'****m done with it all. I****'****m done with hating them, I****'****m done with loving them. I****'****m done with them and I****'****m not going to get trapped in their spiders web anymore, I****'****m letting go, moving on and forgetting. Forgetting it all.**

"Happy Birthday Brooke," I whispered to myself as I blew out the candle on the pink frosted cupcake Rachel had left for me before she had gone out. I turned my gaze to the scrapbook on my lap, flicking through the pages carelessly as I recalled all of my birthday's one by one.

It wasn't till I became friends with Peyton that I'd had a proper birthday. I didn't even know what a birthday was until Larry, Peyton's adopted father wished me one when I turned nine. Up until those years that special day was just an ordinary one; I would be at home, wasting my day away as I sat waiting the arrival of my no-show parents.

Peyton had made sure from that day on that all my birthdays were special, we even had a tradition. Ever year we would go to my favourite store and Peyton would steal a present that I'd picked out. That gave me a high, made me feel special. Someone had stolen something _for_ me. Done something _for_ me. That made me realise that Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer was my best friend and from my ninth birthday onwards she would always be.

Yet now here I sit on my eighteenth birthday, alone and miserable. Sure Peyton had continued on the tradition but with someone else. That someone else was Lucas Scott. The boy that had driven a wedge between our friendship making it almost non-existent until now here we were not friends at all.

It started off when he joined the basketball team. According to Peyton, Lucas had asked her to be with him and she turned him down having just come out of a dysfunctional relationship with his brother. So instead he settled for seconds. Peyton's best friend, Brooke Davis. Me.

I was stupid and fell in love with Lucas Scott too fast, thinking he was the one for me where in actual fact I was just the girl who was too stupid to see that he and my best friend were fooling around behind my back. Yeah, life can be cruel sometimes.

Lucas Scott then asked out Peyton Sawyer a couple everyone believed were meant to be, seeing as Lucas had been crushing on her since childhood.

However she turned him down, wanting to reconcile her friendship with me and me being a person who believes in redemption forgave her and we put the past behind us.

However our infamous love triangle was started up again when Lucas Scott kissed me and this time I left with more than just a broken heart.

Lucas Scott and I eventually found our way, as I always say 'People Who Are Meant To Be Together, Will Always Find Their Way In The End.' Unfortunately I just hadn't realised that, that didn't apply to our relationship. However after Lucas and Peyton's deathbed kiss and Peyton's revelation of her feelings, I realised that I didn't always want to feel insecure, lonely or close off. And so I gave up. I forgot the past and I moved on.

However I didn't count that once I left I would still end up with a broken heart even if I also had the epiphany that Brooke Davis and Lucas Scott just weren't meant to be.

That was how Peyton Sawyer's and Brooke Davis's friendship ended, maybe one day it might heal itself.

But nothing goes back to the way it was before.

Closing my scrapbook, I tucked it under the mattress of the bed Rachel had so kindly offered me and leant my head back on the pillow.

For some reason Peyton and I seemed to have swapped. She was now the cheery one, laughing with Lucas as they walked down the road and I was the broody one, hidden away in my bedroom, crying over the past.

It didn't help that I was trying to keep my mind distracted, that I was trying to focus on a happy memory to keep myself from breaking down.

If Brooke Davis had survived two love triangles, three broken hearts and a tattered friendship then she could survive this right? Brooke Davis was strong enough to pull through right?

Nothing not even the word everyone hated could bring her down.

Not even Cancer.

The next day, Brooke sat in the white-walled waiting room carelessly flicking through the latest edition of Seventeen. Not even she could bring herself to gush over the latest 'hot bod' as her foot tapped the floor nervously.

It seemed every time she looked up she was met by a sympathetic face, all thinking the same 'Such a young girl waiting for the oncologist, such a shame.'

"Brooke Davis!" The receptionist stopped her typing to listen to a message coming through from the Bluetooth set she wore.

Brooke stood, walking towards the desk with small steps.

"The doctor will see you now." The receptionist, an older woman gave her a tender smile and Brooke drew strength from it, with calm steady steps she approached the wooden door labelled Oncologist and pushed it.

"Brooke, it's lovely to see you again, are you ready to talk about your condition?" The doctor, a young man in his early twenties sent the shaking Brooke Davis a warm smile and motioned for her to take a seat in the comfortable red-leather chairs he sat across from.

"From your CT we have confirmed that you have do indeed have a brain tumour. Your specific type is called Medulloblastoma and it is a malignant tumour otherwise known as cancerous. It is formed from cells that were poorly developed in your early childhood and is developed in your cerebellum which is the upper part of your brain. It is rare that the tumour will move to any other part of your body however if we do not act fast then it may move to other parts of your brain. Now that we have located the tumour we need to get an exact diagnosis so we can find out how big the tumour is, in what position it is in and where exactly in the cerebellum it is so that we can work out how to remove it. This will mean you have to have a biopsy, this is a surgery that involves high trained radiologists taking a sample of your brain cells or tissue to examine. The operations is of course as all are a risk but it would help determine your situation."

"Surgery." Brooke swallowed as she pictured lying on an operation bed in a bright white room as doctors dressed in blue scrubs opened up her brain and...

"Yes, it would be a great help to your condition, Brooke, all we need is confirmation from you and parental consent."

"Parental consent, but I'm eighteen."

"So you are, then all we need is your consent and we can go ahead and book you an appointment for your operation."

"Does it hurt?"

"No, you will be given an anaesthetic during your surgery and pain medicine afterwards but the pain should not be unbearable. However their are possible complications you should be aware of before you sign the sheets stating your consent. Of course a complication is rare but no procedure is free of risks. Any complications may include, bleeding, infections, swelling of the brain, blood clots, heart attack and damage to the brain such as changes in memory, behaviour, thinking or speech. Vision problems, balance problems, bladder and bowel problems, seizures and paralysis or weakness. You may also feel dizzy, have strong headaches, receive signs of infection and fainting spell and nausea these are all common but if any of those do occur you are to see me immediately, I will write down my contact number on which I am reachable 24/7."

Brooke nodded as the doctor slid over a piece of paper and asked her to get her phone out and record it now.

"Ok now for the surgery we ask you to fast between 8-12 hours before, take your morning medicine that I will prescribe and to arrange for a ride home from someone. It is also advised that you have a room-mate for up to a week after the surgery so you may want to ask your mum if she can move in with you and leave poor old dad cold in bed." The doctor joked and Brooke looked down.

"My parents don't live here.

"Hmmm?"

"My parents, they live in California."

"Then where do you live."

"With a friend Rachel."

"Well then make sure Rachel can share a bedroom with you then."

The doctor frowned as he updated Brooke's file.

"Is there anything else I need to know?" Brooke asked.

"No that is all, but be aware that before your surgery there will be a few procedure you have to go through.

"Now your appointment is next Monday at 10am , so I'd say eat a full meal before you go to bed so you don't wake up hungry the next morning and arrange for a lift around 2pm."

"Is that all Doctor?"

"Yes, and as I tell all my patients this journey is very intimate and I think it's best if you call me Chase."

"Well bye Chase." Brooke got up from her seat, sending the doctor a quick smile before exiting.

"Miss Davis, care to explain why you are 25 minutes late to third period English Literature ?"

"Sorry Sir, I guess I woke up late." Brooke shrugged her shoulders, her mood deflated from her earlier appointment.

"That won't do Miss Davis, see me after school."

He handed her a red-slip which she then crumpled up and threw in her bag under the beady eyes of Mr Samuels

Sitting down, Nathan gave her a questioning look which she returned with a shrug and put her head down on the desk her eyes closing with tiredness.

"Miss Davis!" Mr Samuels, shouted from the front of the classroom, rapping on the board with a pencil.

She lifted her drowsy head, fixing her half-shut eyes on the teacher.

"If you could refrain from sleeping, it would be most welcome. School is no place to cure a hangover." He reprimanded, Brooke nodded, resting her head upon her hands as she tried to focus her attention on the dead poet they were discussing.

"I expect better from you Miss Davis, just because you are student body president and head cheerleader does not give you a free pass." Mr Samuels shook his head at the brunette as she passed him at the end of class.

"I know, sorry sir." She apologised in a quiet tone before walking out, her head down.

"Hey Brooke!" Haley greeted her friend as they both entered their Government and Politics class.

"Where've you been, I looked for you at break."

"Oh, I came in late." Brooke gave her best friend a weak smile as they sat at their desks.

"Seriously Brooke partying again?" Haley raised an eyebrow.

"I didn't party, and anyway so what if I did it was my birthday."

"It was your birthday yesterday! Brooke, Happy eighteenth, oh I'm sorry it must have slipped my mind with the accident and all the news I've been receiving yesterday. I'm so sorry, did you have a good day?" Haley leaned forward to hug Brooke as their teacher Mrs Marks walked in.

"Tell me later." Haley mouthed to Brooke as she again let her head drop as the teacher began to speak.

"Brooke Davis, how many times do I have to tell you no sleeping in class, I do not care how hard your head is pounding or how late you partied last night, please do not sleep in my-" The teacher was cut off as Brooke bent over and vomited all over her patent black shoes.

"Brooke Davis, go to the nurses office at once, she has a cure for all of you late night drinkers." The teacher shrieked, as she tried to wipe her shoes.

Brooke slunk out of the class-room and made her way to the nurses office.

"What's wrong?" The nurse Mrs HillyFeather asked as Brooke sat down on faded blue cot

Brooke explained how she had vomited on the teachers shoes and the nurse shook her head.

"All you young 'uns seem to drink nowadays, now let me get my special hangover cure out."

"Mrs HillFeather it's not because I drank, because I didn't."

"Then what is it?"

"I have a doctors not, well from the receptionist at the local hospital explaining why." Brooke handed her the folded note she had received from the receptionist at the oncologist's waiting from earlier. It had been burning a hole in her pocket and Brooke felt she had to tell someone.

"Oh, dear, you poor girl." The nurse scanned the note giving Brooke a look she loathed.

"Now it says you've been prescribed some medicine."

"Yeah it's right here." Brooke retrieved a large navy bottle from her bag followed by a similar looking green one.

"Well I suggest you take it, it says here you should be taking it every four hours to stop symptoms such as nausea."

Mrs HillyFeather handed Brooke a metal spoon and watched as she followed the instructions on the label.

"There all done, now I suggest you take the rest of these two periods off and then go off to lunch, get some food in your system." The nurse smiled at Brooke.

"You know it's better to tell someone."

"I know." Brooke replied before turning over and drifting off to sleep.

Brooke was awoken by the nurse shaking her, "It's time for lunch, now take your medicine again when need-be, If you even need me I'm in here." The nurse patted Brooke on the back before pushing her out of the door.

"There you are Brooke, you never came back!" Haley grabbed Brooke's hand and dragged her over to the lunchtable where the others sat waiting.

The others meaning Lucas, Peyton, Nathan, Rachel, Mouth, Skills and Bevin

"Hey guys!" Brooke waved to them as she sat down next to Haley.

"Hey Fatass, where'd you go this morning?" Rachel asked as she ended her conversation with Mouth.

"Just around." Brook replied.

"I thought you woke up late." Nathan asked confused.

"Yeah well I got up, went out came back and slept." Brooke told him.

"OMG, slut had sex!" Rachel squealed, "You know it's always the best kind birthday sex." Rachel said matter of factly.

Lucas winced and Peyton turned to look at Brooke.

"You broke the tradition." She said.

"No you broke the tradition, I hope Lucas liked the perfume." Brooke replied, trying her best not to appear catty.

The blondes eyes widened as they realised Brooke had in fact been at the mall lat night.

"What tradition?"

"Just a stupid birthday thing Tutor Girl."

"Oh, yeah once again I'm sorry about forgetting your birthday Brookie." Haley told Brooke.

"It's ok, who didn't."

"Did your parents not call?" Nathan asked and Brooke shook her head. "When have they ever, it's not like 18's all that special, it just means I'm legally an adult." She said sarcastically.

"Oh, Tigger, Hey! I know what will cheer you up. A birthday party."

"I don't really want-"

"It can be at my place if you want?" Rachel offered.

"But, I'm not really up-"

"I can bring the beer" Skills and Nathan both grinned at each other.

"I don't want a-"

"It's settled how abouts."

"I don't want a birthday!" Brooke slapped her hands down on the table as she felt her mood-swings kick in.

"But!"

"Hales, I'm sorry, but I'm not really in the mood for a party, my birthday's been and gone, you missed it." Brooke sighed as she sat down.

"You called me Hales." Haley frowned."You never do that!"

"Yeah, well I needed to get the message across." Brooke let her head rest against the cool stone, for some reason she was still tired even after around 2 hours sleep.

"Still tired whore, that must have been some guy last night or should I say some guys." Rachel grinned cheekily

"Not in the mood Rache," Brooke stood as she addressed the group.

"I'm sorry guys, I guess I'm a little tired, I think I'm gonna get a pass to go home, see you later maybe, sorry for being grouchy the birthday party was a really nice idea thanks. Is it too late to want one?"

They all shook their heads as Brooke waved a goodbye.

"Well someone didn't get up on the right side of bed this morning." Rachel commented and they all groaned, no-one except Mouth and Brooke liked Rachel let alone tolerated her.

"Go away husband-stealing whore."

"Don't tell me to go away boyfriend-stealing hussy!" Rachel replied back.

Peyton shut up and Rachel grinned.

One to Rachel and Brooke. Zero to Lucas and Peyton


	2. The Policy Of Truth

Chapter Two- The Policy Of Truth

"The truly scary thing about undiscovered lies is that they have a greater capacity to diminish us than exposed ones. They erode our strength, our self-esteem, our very foundation." – Cheryl Hughes

"Brooke?" Rachel began as Brooke closed the door to the bathroom, her hands touching the soft curls of her hair.

"Brooke...do you...are you."

"Rache, spit it out!" Brooke chuckled, as she raked her hands through her hair, glad that for now it was all there.

"Are you pregnant?"

"What! No, you're the slut not me!" Brooke cried in her defence.

"Woah, Brooke now I know you've defo got a bun in the oven. Raging hormones." Rachel grinned at her wound up friend.

"Shut up whore! You have no proof."

"As I said, hormones, you vomiting in there and of course you missing school because you were at the hospital yesterday."

"What! How did you know, they called me up to confirm that you live here." Rachel smirked, thinking she had trapped Brooke in a hole.

"I'm not pregnant slut!"

"So are you gonna keep it or..."

"I'm not pregnant!"

"Oh just stop denying it, the school's going to find out soon anyway, well if you decide to keep it."

Brooke stomped her foot in annoyance, storming out of the bedroom as she double checked her appearance in the hall mirror. Ever since her appointment she had been looking to make sure her shiny hair was still in place, the doctor had warned her that during the biopsy the back half would be shaved so they could drill a hole and after the chemotherapy or radiation it would all fall out. Brooke didn't want her hair to fall out, she loved her hair, it was her prize possession.

"Yeah, you can walk fast but I can't wait until you're waddling." Rachel called after the angered brunette.

"Hey Brooke, do you think you can do me another favour?" Haley asked Brooke as they walked to Economics together.

"What sort of favour?"

"Well I haven't told Nathan yet so I was wondering if-"

"I would come to the doctors with you, sure Tutor Wife, but you need to tell your hubbie and soon, he'll start to notice when you inflate."

"Who's inflating?" Rachel poked her head in between the girls interrupting their _private_ chat.

"Are you talking about Brooke, because she's definitely going to be doing some inflating some time soon." Rachel winked at her friend who scowled in response.

"Soon she'll be an elephant or maybe a whale." Rachel thought up new animals to tease Brooke with.

"I'm confused." Haley looked at the red-head baffled as to what she could be talking about.

"You'll understand soon, Brooke will show us all exactly what I was talking about, won't you Brooke."

Brooke huffed loudly and flipped Rachel off. "Suck on this whore."

"Now, now slut, I don't know where that's been, seeing as you've been absent a lot lately."

"Shut up Rache!" Brooke pushed the red-head and stormed off.

"You went too far Rachel." Haley sighed, running after Brooke who had passed their classroom.

"No I didn't." Rachel said to herself confused, Brooke was usually up for her taunts, it must be her hormones, she thought chuckling.

"Hey Brooke!" Nathan called as a whirlwind of a brunette passed him her face furious.

"What's wrong?" He asked his wife as she quickly followed Brooke, her legs moving fast.

"Nothing to be worried about." She gave him a quick smile and a peck on the cheek before continuing.

"Class is this way!" Lucas shouted having just finished his drink from the nearby water fountain.

"We'll be there soon!" Haley turned to look at the blonde for a second and gave him a look saying '_cover for me please'._

"Never thought I'd see the day Haley James skips class, this must be your influence." Lucas caught up with his brother as the bell rang.

"It's Haley James Scott and that's insulting dude, Haley has her own mind." Nathan replied before entering his 1st period.

"Brooke, what's the matter?" Haley entered the 2nd floor bathroom knocking on the door that had just closed.

"I'm not pregnant." Brooke shouted loudly from her position on the toilet seat, her legs curled up beneath her.

"I know Brookie, I am." Haley laughed a little.

"No you don't understand, Rachel just keeps making stupid jokes about me having a bun in the oven and it's just...ugh you don't understand."

"Then make me understand Tigger." Haley pleaded, "I mean I skipped class for you."

"You did?" Brooke sniffled, a giggle escaping her mouth

"I know Haley James skipping is life-changing, now are you gonna come out so that we can go back to class and not get a detention for skipping, I don't want to ruin my clean slate." Haley watched as the red door was unlocked and slowly swung open showing a teary-eyed Brooke Davis.

"Now I won't press you now but later you need to tell me what's going on ok?" Haley looked to Brooke who nodded in response.

"Yes TutorMum!"

"Shh not so loud."

"Whoops!" Brooke looked around only to find the halls empty.

"Come on let's get to Economics, I do want to graduate." Haley linked arms with Brooke and together they paraded down the hall-way towards their classroom

"So, what's our cover?" Haley asked Brooke as they paused outside of the classroom.

"Brooke Davis doesn't do covers." Brooke patted Haley's hand before opening the classroom door and waltzing in.

"Brooke Davis, I'm sure you have a funny excuse for why you are late."

"Well the thing is-"

"Haley James, late, well well well, this day just gets better and better." Mr Conrad boomed, chuckling to himself.

"Um, Sir, well I, um I." Haley looked lost.

"Haley was just helping me out, I had a few girl problems if you know what I mean." Brooke winked at the teacher who visibly blushed as she sashayed over to her chair Haley following behind meekly.

"Um, well, um lets proceed with the lesson." Mr Conrad was flustered by the previous comment and managed to drop his board pen on the floor. As he bent down to pick it up his pants ripped and the whole class burst in to hysterics.

"He wears pink spotty boxers." Lucas snorted and Haley joined in with the giggling.

"Excuse me," Mr Conrad backed himself up against the wall and began sliding across towards the door. Opening it, he flashed the class a quick show of his boxers before running out of the door.

"Shame, those boxers really did it for me." Brooke said tapping her pencil against the table.

Brooke giggled, tilting back in her chair, moving in a rocking motion.

"Don't do that Brooke you might fall." Haley told her but Brooke ignored her, continuing to lean back in her chair.

"What about you Lucas?" Brooke turned her gaze on to the gob-smacked basketball player.

Lucas was shocked, Brooke was actually talking to him, ever since their break-up she hadn't so much as looked in his direction yet here she was addressing him with a question.

"You gonna answer Broody?" The nickname was out before Brooke could stop it.

"Yeah sure, well they er, what was the question?"

Brooke giggled, tilting back in her chair, rocking in a

It was at that moment that Brooke fell limp and crashed to the floor from her tilted chair.

"Brooke!" Haley let her chair fall to the ground as she crouched down to help her friend.

"Call the nurse, call an ambulance." Lucas shouted bending down to check whether Brooke was breathing.

"She's not breathing!" Lucas's voice was weak and he was trembling.

"They're on their way." A student neither Lucas or Haley knew the name of closed the lid to her phone and came running over to check Brooke.

"Does anyone know CPR?" Haley was frantic, Brooke wasn't breathing, she had told her, told her to stop rocking and now...

There were blank faces around the room and the two best friends were more worried than ever.

"I'll try!" Lucas crossed his hand over Brooke's chest and began giving her chest compressions. After 100 he stopped and pinched together Brooke's nose, breathing in to her mouth.

"Nothing's working!" He shouted up to Haley after 2 minutes had passed.

"The nurse is here!" Haley called back just as Mrs HillyFeather burst in to the room breathless from running across the school.

"Has anyone called an ambulance?" She asked rushing over to Brooke's side.

"Yeah, they're on their way." A kid spoke up, from where he stood anxiously watching.

"Let me take over." The nurse said taking Lucas's position next to Brooke. She continued the compressions and breathing until four men in a green uniform appeared, wheeling a hospital bed. Brooke was loaded on, after an oxygen mask was placed over her mouth and they began wheeling her out of the school.

By now the class was over and students began piling out of classrooms watching as one of their fellow classmates was loaded in to an ambulance.

"That wasn't Haley was it?" Nathan rushed over to Lucas who stood watching the departing ambulance.

"No, it was Brooke. Haley went with her, I'm supposed to be following."

"I'll come with you."

"Was that Brooke?" Rachel and Mouth hastened their pace out of the school wanting to catch up with the two brothers.

"Yeah, we're going to the hospital, Hales is in the ambulance." Lucas opened his car door.

"Um, we won't all fit."

"That's ok, I'll take Mouth in my car." Rachel hustled Mouth to move quicker as they piled in to her SUV.

Five students sat in the waiting room waiting for any news of their friend.

After three hours had passed Brooke's bed was trundled out again and down the hall.

"Where are you taking here?" Haley asked one of the men in green.

"Sorry Family only, go down to the receptionist she'll let you know." The man gave her a nod before loading the unconscious Brooke in to the elevator and closing the doors.

"Come on!" Rachel pulled Mouth up and they all walked down to reception.

"Hi, we're looking for our friend Brooke Davis, we want to know where she's been admitted to."

"Sorry family only."

"I'm her cousin." Rachel said.

"Immediate family only, come back with her parents and we'll let you know."

"Bitch!" Rachel raised her middle finger at the woman as they all went and sat back down.

"Rachel!"

White walls surrounded her and she was trapped on a bed, held by an IV. "Ahh!" Brooke screamed her heart rate going in to overload.

"Calm down, calm down." Chase, Brooke's oncologist soothed, coming in to the room.

"Why am I in hospital, did I have the surgery." Brooke lifted her needle free hand to feel her hair, checking it was all there.

"No you haven't had the surgery yet Miss Davis, but your here because you collapsed, today earlier in class."

Brooke recalled her head spinning as she tried to focus on Lucas, her chair was rocking and she felt out of control, all of a sudden she was falling and then darkness.

"Darkness, I was surrounded by darkness!" Brooke spoke out loud.

"Yes, Miss Davis you fell off your chair and due to a severe bump on your head you were rendered unconscious, You know Miss Davis you must take it easy, it won't help your condition."

"I know Chase, so when do I get out of here."

"Well seeing as you have a head injury you need someone to come and collect you."

"Oh, are any of my friends here?"

"Maybe I'm not sure, until we were certain you were stable only immediate family were available. Would you like me to call up any visitors in the waiting room for Brooke Davis.

"No it's alright, I can meet them in the waiting room right- so why are you here aren't you supposed to be in the oncology wing."

"Miss Davis I am in the oncology wing, and so are you?"

"Why am I here?"

"Because you have...cancer you are unable to take any medicine unless you have permission and so any hospitalization has to be supervised in this wing. Any other questions?"

"No that was all...but can I leave now."

"Yes, let me just detach the IV and call for a wheelchair I will also make sure you have someone to collect you so I will come down to the waiting room with you."

"That large needle was in me?" Brooke stared in horror at the needle the doctor had pulled out from underneath her skin.

"It was painless wasn't it?"

"I suppose." Brooke agreed although she felt a slight stinging pain in her hand.

"Ugh, I'm in a horrible gown." Brooke looked down at her hospital clothes in disgust.

"I have the clothes you arrived in, right here, although the top does have a stain of blood on it so..."

"I'll wear it, anything is better than these rags." Brooke took the clothes the doctor had folded up for her and with Chase's hand stepped off the bed.

"My legs feel like jelly."

"That's normal." Chase laughed as Brooke stumbled.

"By the way the bathroom's in that direction." Chase pointed to a door in the opposite direction to where Brooke was headed.

"Oops," She gave Chase a quick grin and shut the door behind her.

"Is anyone here for Brooke Davis?" The receptionist called across the room, the five friends stood up walking over to her.

"Are we allowed to see her now?" Haley asked her nails tapping the desk impatiently.

"Miss Davis has been discharged and will be here shortly, she has been discharged on the condition she has someone drive her home and stay overnight with her."

"I'll drive her, we share a room anyway." Rachel informed the woman sat behind the desk who nodded.

"Are you Rachel Gatina?"

"Yes that's me."

"You've confirmed your details for Miss Davis's file haven't you."

"Yes!"

"Good, you can go and wait over there."

The five trooped over to the exit and waited for their best friend to arrive. Mouth was the first to spot her.

"Brooke!"

"Hey guys!" Brooke waved to her friends who were all eyeing her anxiously.

"Is blood a new trend slut?" Rachel pointed out the stain on the back of Brooke's v-neck.

"Yeah whore, which means you're clothes are so out of date." Brooke grinned drawing Rachel in for a hug.

"Brooke, I'm so glad your safe, Lucas and I were so worried when we saw you fall over, there was so much blood and you weren't breathing and when they moved you we thought we thought."Haley rambled as she gave Brooke a tight hug.

"Don't worry TutorWife I'm fine." Brooke kissed the top of Haley's head before letting go of her.

"Hey Brooke," Lucas approached the weak brunette, holding out his arms.

"Thanks Luke, for being there it means a lot." Brooke replied dodging her ex-boyfriends hug and instead throwing herself in to Nathan's arms.

"Hey hotshot, I hope you kept TutorGirl calm."

"Sure did, but we were worried about you Brooke, why'd ya move hospital rooms anyway?"

"Um, because, well my file wasn't accurate and I was allergic to their medicine so they had to take me to a different ward." Brooke lied.

"Oh," The subject was dropped after that and the friends departed having given Brooke one last squeeze and orders to phone the married couple when she got back.

"So what happened exactly?" Mouth queried as Rachel started the car.

"All I remember is leaning back in my seat, TutorWife telling me off and then boom I was in hospital, I think they said I fell off and hit my head."

"No other reason?"

"No Mouth, no other reason, I'm just a cluts that's all."

"A cluts who almost died."

"As if you didn't almost die last week Bitch." Brooke replied.

"That is...very true." Rachel sighed, pulling up to Mouth's house.

"Your stop, McFadden."

"Um, if it's alright with you, I'd like to stay at yours tonight, just to make sure Brooke's alright."

"Course, your always welcome Mouth. Now go get your stuff or ya might be sleeping naked tonight." Rachel leaned over to ruffle the brunette boy's hair with a grin.

Brooke beamed at him as he leapt out like an excited puppy and opened the door to his house, zooming upstairs to get her stuff.

"So did they move ya cause you were preggers." Rachel asked snapping some gum in her mouth.

"How many times do I have to tell you I'm not pregnant." Brooke snapped at the red-head annoyed.

"Ya know Mouth's gonna find out tonight when ya start vomiting and craving really odd food, then the secrets gonna be out." Rachel grinned.

"Oh just shut up." Brooke leaned her head against the window feeling weak, she realised she hadn't taken her medicine in the past eight hours.

"So was Lucas worried when I you know collapsed?"

"Brooke, how many times have I told ya to get over blondie?"

"Rache, I am completely over Lucas and I'm all for Peyton getting together with him I just don't want him to start saving me instead of his girlfriend." Brooke admitted truthfully.

"Yeah, well that's not gonna happen, yeah he might have helped you when you were broke but Lucas Scott has never returned the favour of _saving you_ so he's not gonna start now."

"Are we ready to go, I'm all set!" Mouth appeared in the car clutching a duffle bag of clothes a grin on his face.

"Yeah, Mouth we're ready to go." Rachel sighed as she watched Brooke slump against the seat.

Lucas Scott may have never saved Brooke but Rachel was gonna try. Even if she did it in her own messed up way.


	3. Do You Want To Know A Secret?

Chapter Three- Do You Want To Know A Secret?

"Joy multiplies when it is shared among friends, but grief diminishes with every division" R.A Salvatore

"Brooke, what are you doing out here?" Mouth tiptoed out in to the garden where Brooke stood, dressed in only a thin night-shirt.

"Are you crying?" Mouth turned to face the fearless Brooke Davis who right now didn't seem to be so strong.

Brooke didn't answer him, instead she leaned in to him and began sobbing harder.

"Brooke what's wrong? Did someone hurt you? Are you cold?2 Mouth took off the old grey hoodie he was wearing and wrapped it around the shivering brunette.

"Shh, shh, what's wrong?" Mouth led Brooke over to a bench and sat her down, his arms hugging her tightly.

"Tell me what's wrong?"

"I want to be a designer," Brooke sobbed in to Mouth's arms.

"I know, your an amazing designer it be a great profession. Has someone said something? Because don't listen to them, your designs are worth a million dollars, I mean you've seen the rising total on your website haven't you?" Mouth nudged the trembling Brooke.

"I want to have three kids, two boys and a girl." Brooke continued.

"You'd be a great mum." Mouth told Brooke who's mouth curved upwards at the edges.

"I want to live in a big house here in Tree Hill and have boutiques all over the world." Brooke said, her tears slowly drying up.

"Can I come live with you, I'm sure you'll have lots of room for old Mouth won't ya?"

"Mouth that's the thing." Brooke began crying again. "I won't have lots of room."

"Sure ya will, a big house has a lot of rooms, unless by then your so famous you get your cool friends to live there."

"No, you don't understand I won't get to have a big house or boutiques all over the world. I won't have three kids or grow up to be a designer?"

"Why not Brooke, if you just try hard enough-"

"I am trying hard, Mouth you just don't understand."

"Understand what Brooke? Right now all I can grasp from your babble is that you feel insecure about reaching your dreams."

"I'm dying." The sentence came out as a whisper and Mouth had to ask Brooke to say it again.

"I'm dying!" She screamed, her voice shaking at the end.

"What?" Mouth's voice wobbled.

"I'm dying, Mouth, I'm dying," tears streamed down Brooke's face as she clutched at the buttons on Mouth's shirt, twisting them.

"What-How-I'm confused." Brooke twisted Mouth's buttons her head down as she said. " I'm ill."

"How ill?" Mouth's voice came out sounding like a strangled cat. "Well of course you're very ill otherwise you couldn't be dy..." Mouth didn't quite manage to sound the whole word out.

"I have a brain tumour." Brooke whispered her voice only loud enough for Mouth to catch her words.

"You have...cancer?" Brooke's mouth contorted in to an ugly grimace not liking the word used. She had never thought of her illness like that. Instead of replying she nodded and looked down at the ground, silvery tears escaping from her shut lids.

"Oh Brooke," Mouth's face was horrified as he scooped his friend in to a big bear hug.

"We need to get you some help, we can beat this, god, you need to tell the others, oh my."

"I'm getting help."

"Hmm?"

"I'm getting help." Brooke murmured in his ear, "I just, I needed to tell someone."

"No-one knows, Brooke you need to tell me."

"I wanted to tell you, so um, can you pick me up on Monday at 2pm please, I'll drive there so all you have to do is drive my car, meet me at the Oncology ward at 2."

Brooke crawled off of the bench, wiping her tears with the sleeve of Mouth's jumper.

"Thanks Mouth." Brooke gave him a tiny smile as she turned and left the scene, hidden by the darkness.

Mouth was left wondering what had just happened and whether it had all been a dream.

Laying back down on his make-shift bed Mouth caught sight of Brooke curled in a tight ball, wearing his jumper and he knew that everything that had happened that night had actually happened. And he didn't know how he felt about it.

"Brooke!" Mouth called as he tried to catch up with Brooke, ever since this morning he had been trying to talk to her, ask her if she was ok but she had avoided him, ducking out of the house early and taking a long route to class.

"Hey Brooke!" Haley appeared in front of Brooke who was trying to escape Mouth.

"Hey Hales, did you want to talk, come on lets go to the bathroom." Brooke grabbed Haley and led her in to the bathroom, Mouth sighed watching as Brooke left out of reach again.

"Hey buddy, what's wrong?" Lucas asked as Mouth leant against the wall next to him.

"Nothing,"

"Well it's obviously something, that was a pretty big sigh."

"Do you ever feel like Brooke's always pushing people away when they need her most."

"Sure, it's her way of protecting herself apparently." Mouth gave Lucas a look.

"Ok, seriously yeah, that's what Brooke does, if she's not pushing you out of her life then she's running away herself. Why?"

"Because, well don't tell Brooke I told you this but she told me some pretty big news yesterday and now she's avoiding me."

"What news?"

"Oh nothing concerning you." Mouth lied, truthfully it concerned everyone, Brooke was ill and right now her chances of living were on a percentage that Mouth didn't like to think of.

"Well if ya need any more advice just come to me, believe me I know Brooke Davis." Lucas chuckled softly, clapping Mouth on the back as he left to go and join Peyton who waited by his locker.

_But do you really?_ Mouth wondered as he left.

"So why did you bring me in here?" Haley asked Brooke as she lifted herself on to the counter.

"Oh ya know I thought we could talk in here, without eavesdroppers."

Haley pointed to the two freshman huddled over by one of the mirrors, looking meekly in their direction.

Brooke looked at them kindly. "Honey, that shade of lip-gloss, just no, now do you think you can give me and my friend some privacy."

"Are you the student body president?" One of the girls asked quietly.

Brooke nodded as a brain wave ran through her.

"You don't have to leave actually, we are." She grabbed hold of Haley's arm and dragged her out.

"We are?"

"Here we are!" Brooke unlocked the door to her President office with a grin.

"Now we can talk privately." She gestured for the pregnant teen to take a seat on one of the comfy cushioned chairs she had supplied the office with.

"Oh, well I wanted to show you this." Haley handed Brooke her first ultrasound photo.

"OMG, the baby's so cute...where is it?" Haley laughed and pointed to a pea like shape in one corner.

"Right there!"

"Oh! So when are you gonna tell Natey, you know you have to I mean he missed out on your first ultrasound, which I'm totally sorry for missing by the way."

"Brooke it's cool you did kinda almost die." Haley chuckled whilst Brooke swallowed.

Almost Die that's what she had done but soon would she be lying on a bed with a sheet over her never waking up, not almost dying but dying. Dead. She shuddered.

"And I plan on telling Nathan tonight, I just don't know how to do it, did you and Lucas ever talk about what would happen?"

"Yeah, when I had the first pregnancy scare, he said he's be there for me but I could tell he was scared." Brooke told her friend and seeing her expression continued with.

"But Nathan's your husband, he's in love with you, he married you twice, he is definitely going to be there all the way and he is going to love this baby with his all Hales."

"Thanks, I needed that." Haley hugged Brooke tightly as they both left the office almost bumping in to the man they had just been talking about.

"Hey Hales."

"Hey husband."

"Excuse me!" Brooke stood by the two who were gazing in to each other's eyes.

"Oh, hey Brooke." Nathan greeted Brooke.

"Yeah, hey, so I'm going to leave you two now."

"Oh no, we're just going out to the bench, come on we have a free period now anyway."

"Um sure—ow—ow—ow ." Brooke clutched her head as it began pounding.

"Brooke are you okay?" The married couple reacted to seeing Brooke bend down to the floor clutching at her head.

"Oh shit, ow—fuck my life ." Brooke screamed as her the pounding increased.

She had gathered quite a lot of attention and Mouth passing through the hall came running over.

"Brooke, are you okay?" He eyed her condition frantically.

"Mouth, can you-ow-shit—ow, fuck!"

"Do you want me to take you home?"

"Ow-yeah-please-fuck-." Mouth along with the Nathan's help pushed his way through the crowd and brought Brooke out to her car.

"Are you going to be alright Brookie Cookie, are these side effects from yesterday." Haley asked as Brooke shouted at the top of her voice.

"I can take her home, you guys go back to school." Mouth said as Nathan opened the car and sat in the drivers seat.

"It's ok, we want to make sure Brooke's alright." Haley smiled not noticing Mouths uneasiness.

"Whats wrong with the slut?" Rachel asked having skipped school for the day after feigning a stomach bug.

"I thought you were ill?" Mouth looked curiously at the red-head who then mimed clutching at her stomach in pain.

"Nah, I can't do this, Mouthie, I know you are very innocent and naive but I am not ill I just skipped." Rachel told her friend as the three dropped Brooke on the sofa.

"So what's wrong with Fatass more elephant problems." Rachel winked at Brooke who moaned and put a cushion over her painful head.

"No, I think it's just a really bad migraine because she hit her head yesterday." Haley informed the red-head.

"Where do you keep your painkiller?" Nathan looked to Rachel who pointed to a cupboard in the kitchen.

"Just don't go touching my coke." She joked and went over to where Brooke lay, perching on the end of the sofa.

"What's this?" Rachel opened Brooke's scrunched up hand revealing Haley's ultrasound photo.

"That's-" Haley began but was cut off.

"I knew you were preggo!" Rachel shouted in glee.

"Who's pregnant?" ~Nathan re-appeared in the room as Haley attempted to snatch the photo off from Rachel.

"Brooke!" Rachel danced around like a mad-woman.

"No I'm not." The worse pain from Brooke's head-ache had worn off and now she was staring indignantly at her friend.

"Then whose this."

"God it's not mine Rache."

"Let's see!" Nathan took the photo off of Rachel, looking at it closely.

"Nathan just let me have the photo I can return it to the right person." Haley took the photo off of Nathan.

"Well Brooke's right there so."

"It's not Brooke whose pregnant." Haley spoke up as Brooke protested against Rachel's comment.

"Then who is Mrs James Scott?" Rachel put her hand on her hip and the four all stared at Haley who was wide-eyed.

"Um, er." Brooke gave Haley an encouraging look.

"It's me." She said.

"What?" Nathan blinked as he stared at his wife.

"Nathan I meant to tell you, really I'm only a month or so, this was my first doctors appointment, I was going to tell you tonight." Haley said the words tumbling out.

"You're pregnant." Nathan's voice was all high and squeaky and Rachel began to laugh as she watched the drama unfold.

"Yeah I am Nate,"

"No! No you can't be." Haley watched as her husband began to deny their baby. This was her worst nightmare.

"You can't be pregnant because the Haley James Scott I know would have told me, straight away, she would have told me." Nathan stumbled backwards until he hit the table, there he turned and ran out of the room.

They all heard Rachel's front door slam loudly and Haley's body jerked at the sound, soon a silent tear rolled down her cheek.

Nathan had left her, after she had told him about their baby.

"Come here, Hales." Brooke held out her arms, wrapping the couch blanket around them as Haley cuddle close.

"It's going to be ok," She soothed.

"Well as much as I want to stay and view this love-fest." Rachel said in disgust.

"Mouth and I have better things to do, ya comin' Mouth?" Rachel tapped the boy on the shoulder.

"Yeah sure," With one last longing glance at Brooke he left the room, making plans to talk to her as soon as possible.

"What if he never speaks to me again." Haley asked in a quiet tone.

"Hales, he's your husband and he loves you he'll come back." Brooke stroked her best friends hair and pulled her closer. She was going to miss this, her friends. She was going to miss all of it.

"What if he divorces me and leaves his child and I on the street."

"Stop talking like this Hales," Brooke ordered. "Nathan is no Dan, he loves you and this child, he is going to come back."

As soon as Brooke had finished saying that there was a resounding knock at the door.

"Now I will bet everything I own that that Is Nathan, but if it isn't can we pretend I didn't bet." Brooke joked untangling herself and Haley from the blanket and pushing her up.

"Go, answer the door.

"But it's not my house." Haley said lingering by the hallway feeling stupid.

"Go!"

Haley walked towards the door and pulled it open, she was instantaneously wrapped in a big bear hug and peppered with kisses.

"I'm so sorry, Hales, I didn't mean to leave you and our child here, are they alright?" Nathan asked worriedly, moving them both in to the hall and closing the door.

"Yeah we're fine." Haley grinned savouring the hug as she dried her tears.

"Good, now I'm still angry at you for not telling me but I want you to know I love you and our child and I'm going to be there every step of the way, alright?" Nathan gripped Haley's chin between his thumb and fore-finger bringing her lips up for a soft feathery kiss.

"Yeah, that's alright, thanks for coming back." Haley leant her head against Nathans chest as he kissed her hair.

"Always." He whispered.

"Now lets go home."

"Mmm, that would be nice—wait a second. Brooke! Honey are you ok with me leaving, Mouth and Rachel are here not that Rachel would be much help." Haley muttered.

"Yeah, I'm fine, go have sex with your husband and leave me here."

Haley smiled at Brooke's antics, and with Nathan on her arm left happy her secret was no longer a secret.

"Brooke, you need to tell the others." Mouth was currently sat next to Brooke as they waited to preview the next outfit Rachel had lined up for her night out.

"I can't, it will destroy them and you know Haley's pregnant she can't deal with stress."

"Oh so what's going to happen if the chemo and radiation don't work." Mouth watched as Brooke winced.

"Not that it will, you're going to be fine I'm just thinking of today and the side-effects of your illness, you have to tell them."

"No! And if I end up dy—then I don't know." Brooke replied stubbornly.

"Please Brooke, I can't hide this much longer."

"Please Mouth, for me." Brooke pleaded looking up at the boy, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"I don't know Brooke." Mouth said quietly as Rachel came gliding out of her dressing room and struck a pose.

Brooke's secret was something that Mouth knew he would guard with his life, but that didn't mean he wanted to.


	4. Still Standing

Chapter Four- Still Standing

" You never know how strong you are... until being strong is the only choice you have." –Cayla Mills

"Are you ready for this?" Mouth asked Brooke as she stroked her lovely brown waves lovingly.

"I'm never going to be ready Mouth, it's a question of do I want to fight?" Brooke told him down the phone as she listened to his steady breathing.

"You need to tell the others Brooke, it's not fair, in fact it's pretty selfish."

"Oh yes it's pretty selfish not to stress out a pregnant woman because your ill, it's pretty selfish not to tell your ex boyfriend and best friend that you might die causing them to pretend to love you."

"Yeah but it's pretty selfish to leave them in the dark." Mouth argued and Brooke bit her lip. She knew he was right but she couldn't bring herself to tell him. How could she tell them. Telling Mouth had been awful and it had been when she was emotionally drained. She hadn't meant to tell him, it just sorta slipped out.

"Brooke! Brooke are you there?"

"Yeah I'm here Mouth."

"So it's 2 you want me to pick you up."

"Yeah, oncology ward."

"Alright well I'll see ya—"

"And Mouth,"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for all of this?"

"Brooke you don't need to thank me—"

"I just want you to know that I appreciate it all, I don't take you for granted Mouth."

"I know Brooke, now I kind of have a class I need to get to so I'll see you later, and remember Brooke Davis is strong. Brooke Davis is fearless."

'_Brooke Davis is fearless.'_

"Mouth, before you go I need to tell you that if I don't make it I—" The phone connection was cut off before Brooke could finish the sentence.

'_I love you'._

"Bye Mouth," Brooke whispered as she slid her phone inside of her handbag and did up the buckle. Now it was time to face the first of her demons and attend her surgery.

With shaking hands Brooke clipped her seatbelt in place, adjusting the mirror she eyed her face wondering if afterwards she would look any different. Well of course she would look different half of her hair would have been shaved off. But her face, would that change, would she appear older with more wrinkles or would her face seem more childish.

'_You can do this Brooke'_ She chanted to herself as she put the key in the engine, twisting it to start the car.

'_Just relax, deep breaths, everything is going to be ok'_ Brooke rested her hands upon the steering wheel and took four deep breaths in before exhaling noisily.

'_You are ready!'She_ slid the sunglasses that had been perched on top of her head over her eyes and with a smooth motion began driving.

Half-way along the road, Brooke began panicking, hyperventilating and she wished now that she had asked Mouth to come with her as well.

Stopping on the side of the road, Brooke began her breathing exercises again and whispering soothing words in her head.

"Ya stuck?" A car rolled up next to Brooke and she groaned, of course it had to be the one person who Brooke did not want to see right now.

"No, I'm not stuck?"

"Then why are you on the side of the road and not at school?"

"Why aren't you at school?" Brooke countered.

"Because today's the anniverserary"

"Oh Shit! Sorry Sawyer I completely forgot, I'm so sorry." Brooke shot an apologetic look to the curly blonde in the car.

"It's ok, I'm sure she'd understand she was a teenager once you know."

Brooke gave a half smile and hoped that this was the end of the conversation.

"So what are you doing on the side of the road?"

"Just breathing!" Brooke shrugged.

"What about school?"

"Oh sorry, Peyton I just forgot I have somewhere to be?" Brooke pressed down on the accelerator and her car jumped forward.

"NO! No Shit!" Brooke leaned over the side of the car peering out of the window, it seemed her car had gotten stuck...in horse manure.

"Yuck!" She cried banging her head back against the seat in exasperation.

"You stuck now?" Peyton's face held amusement and Brooke scowled at her.

"I have a very important appointment to get to and it starts...right now?" Brooke looked down at the flashing time on her phone and slapped her head.

"You want a lift?"

"No it's ok Sawyer I can get one." Brooke dialled the number she had saved for Mouth but was met by a woman greeting her and telling her that she had run of out credit.

"Stupid credit!" Brooke huffed throwing her phone back in her bag.

"Look Brooke, I may not be your friend anymore but I can still give you a lift to wherever your going?"

Brooke bit her lip, hesitating. Peyton was offering a free ride and she was due at the hospital right now, on the other hand she couldn't risk letting Peyton know where she was going.

"Alright!" Brooke opened her car door, jumping over the stinky mud that had her car trapped.

"Hop on up!"

"So where ya heading?"

"Um, can you drop me off at the Dinky Ink Arts Store please?"

"Why are you going there?" Peyton asked as she set the car in motion, curious to know why her friend was going to an art shop.

"I'm picking something up, for a friend."

"I thought you had an appointment?"

"An appointment with the lady of the store, duh?"

"You know Vera?"

"Of course I know Vera, that's who I'm meeting?"

"Funny I never knew Greg was also a girl!" Peyton burst out laughing as Brooke realised she had been tricked.

"You're such a bitch Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer."

"That was hilarious, no come on be serious, where are you really going?"

"None of your business!"

"Do you want a ride?"

"God Peyton it's nothing of interest to you!"

"Then why can't you tell me, seriously you know me Brooke I'm not going to blab."

"No you kiss them instead!" Brooke said snarkily.

"Brooke I told you I was sorry about the kiss."

"Whatever!"

"Brooke I need a place to drop you off at, or would you rather walk?"

" Fine, drop me off at St Mary's Hospital please."

"Why are you going to the hospital."

"No reason!"

"Come on Brooke, is someone ill?"

"No no-one's ill I'm just going for a check up."

"Then why didn't you go to the GP."

"No reason!"

"Oh my God, you're pregnant aren't you, you're pregnant and it's Lucas's."

"No I am not pregnant P Sawyer, why does everyone always assume that."

"Fine, you're not pregnant but please can you just tell me why?"

"No!"

"Alright, here you are." Peyton drove through in to the parking lot of the hospital and waited patiently as Brooke got out.

"Do you need a ride back?"

"No I've got one, it's cool!"

"Alright, bye then, see you." Peyton shut the door Brooke had exited from with a loud bang and drove slowly out of the parking lot leaving Brooke alone.

'_Hospital' _Brooke thought as she advanced towards the Oncology wing, her legs like jelly and her arms trembling.

"Hi I'm Brooke Davis, I'm here for Dr um I don't know his last name but his first name is Chase, I'm having a brain biopsy today."

"Take a seat." The receptionist droned and Brooke sat down on one of the hard plastic blue chairs.

"Brooke Davis!" A lady dressed in scrubs with a mask around her neck came out in to the waiting room holding a clipboard.

"That's me!" Brooke stood and the receptionist waved her on.

"Go on then," Brooke joined the lady who told her, her name was Helen.

"Come in," Helen ushered Brooke in to Chase's office were he sat, looking very professional in a proper white coat and gloves.

"Hi Brooke, I'm glad you weren't a no-show."

"Oh yeah, I'm sorry I was late my car got stuck in some horse poo and then my ex best friend who I think is sorta my friend now well she picked me up." Brooke explained.

"Well I think you have a valid excuse, now before your biopsy can start we have to ask you quite a few mandatory questions."

Brooke sat there for an hour and a half as the doctors asked her a bazillion and one questions all using medical terms she didn't understand.

"Now I think that was the last question and my fellow employees will take you to go and get ready for your surgery."

"Will you be doing the operation?"

"No, no, one of our fine neurosurgeons will do it, accompanied by Jeff our radiologist." Jeff one of the men that had interviewed her gave a little wave and Brooke smiled at him reassured just a little.

"Now come along dear in to this room." Helen led her in to a ward along the corridor and sat her on the bed whilst Jeff left to go get ready.

"Now, stay calm, don't panic and don't move your head." Helen picked up a pair of scissors and a large razor.

"Are you shaving my head?"

Helen smiled sweetly at her. "I know a lot of ya'll don't like this but trust me, it will grow back, now do you want all of your hair shaved or just the bit they will be drilling open.

_Drilling open._ Brooke swallowed.

"All of it please." She couldn't bear looking lopsided with half of her hair gone, it was better to watch it all disappear and buy a super cool looking wig.

"Ya sure?"

"Just get on with it!" Brooke sighed impatiently as she tapped her fingers against the linen sheets of the hospital bed.

"Alright," Helen bought the razor up and began to shave off Brooke's beautiful curls.

One by one, wavy brown curls fell to the floor, and silvery tears fell on top of them.

Brooke's hair was a part of an image, without it she looked different, she felt different.

"All done." Helen handed Brooke a mirror and Brooke touched the glass staring in horror at the bald head she wore.

"It's all gone." Brooke breathed staring at the image of her, it seemed unreal, and Brooke could hardly believe that the person staring back and making the same movements as her _was_ her. But it was. They had the same hazel orbs, rimmed with gold and the same cherry red lips that spread in to a wide smile. They had the same eyebrows that could kink instantly when she was confused and even the same dimples.

"It'll grow back Brooke." Helen consoled the tearful brunette.

"How long?"

"How long what?"

"Will I have to wear a stupid wig?"

"It depends on the hair really!"

"Ugh!" Brooke groaned.

"I'm supposed to take you to the operation room now."

"It's time?"

"Just relax, you'll be given an anaesthetic and it will all be over soon."

"Ok, just relax." Brooke inhaled and exhaled as she was marched along the passage.

"Here we are, you ready." Helen pushed open a large white door with the sign OPERATION ROOM, EMPLOYEES ONLY.

"We're here, Omigod I can't do this." Brooke squealed as she peered inside the white-walled room. Everything was so stark and clear. It gave Brooke a feeling she didn't want.

Clarity.

Brooke didn't want to do this alone, she couldn't do this alone.

"Brooke breathe, Miss Davis, wake up." Brooke could hear the faint sound of someone speaking to her.

"What happened, she tried to sit up but her body wouldn't work, everything ached."

"It's all over, the procedure is done."

"I had the biopsy?"

"Yes Miss Davis and everything went smoothly."

"Ow!" Brooke put her hand to her head gingerly touching the bump that had formed after the surgery. It stung and Brooke retracted her hand quickly.

"Yes it will sting for a couple of days, I've prescribed you a couple of painkillers don't use anything else, I noted that your body seems to have taken some penicillin recently , I thought I told you about painkillers.

"Oh yeah, sorry Chase, I had a really bad headache, it was so painful."

"Well, in future come to me ok."

"Now I think you're all set to go, you do have someone picking you up because otherwise we're going to have to keep you overnight, driving in your current state could be very harmful."

"I have someone picking me up." Brooke reassured the doctor who gave her a smile.

"Good, now I'll just come down to reception with you to sign a few forms alright?"

"Ok, um when do I hear?"

"The results should come back between 3-5 days and then we can talk about your options."

Chase held out his hand to Brooke who took in and climbed down off of the bed she had been laying on.

"Brooke!" Mouth spotted the brunette instantly as she entered the room accompanied by a fair-haired doctor.

"Hey Mouth," Brooke's response wasn't very cheerful but Mouth didn't mind what she was going through was so hard, he could only imagine it.

"You ready to go?"

"Um, I've just got to sign a few things first, can you wait?"

"Sure," Mouth replied he was a patient guy, hell he'd been waiting here for half an hour already. Not wanting to miss his friend he had arrived early jut to make sure.

"Ok then," Brooke gave a sort of jerky nod and turned to face the desk and the grumpy receptionist Mouth had, had a conversation with earlier.

Mouth noticed that Brooke seemed sort of fragile, like she was coming apart, it was more obvious now after the surgery that Brooke was no longer the enthusiastic bouncing girl she had been now she was much more quiet and subdued._ Broken_

"I'm ready." Mouth heard a quiet murmur from behind him and gallantly wrapped his arm around her waist to support her and opened the hospital door.

Feeling the wind brush over her shaven head Brooke felt tears appear in her eyes. Everything that had once been was gone.

'_Peyton was no longer her best friend, Lucas was no longer her boyfriend, She was no longer had a positive outlook on life, she no longer had hair. Everything was changing and not for the better._' She thought

She felt broken inside, as if everything that had held her together was gradually coming apart and there was nothing she could do to stop it. Brooke Davis was falling, slowly and quietly but all the same she was falling.


	5. Don't You Know You're Beautiful

Chapter Five- Don't You Know You're Beautiful

"One of the greatest journeys in life is overcoming insecurity and learning to truly not give a shit." –J.A Konrath

Brooke stood debating wig colours in a shop in Charlotte when her phone rang. It had been two days since her biopsy and so far she had been pretending she was ill ( Side effects of her head injury) so as not to show her bald head.

"Mouth!" She called her voice showing the anxiety she felt. The brown haired boy she had called for, ran over from where he had been looking at wig lengths and came to stand beside his friend.

"Answer it," He told her and with shaking fingers Brooke proceeded to answer the call.

"Chase?" She asked having programmed his name in to her phone.

"Brooke, you're test results are in, I would like to schedule an appointment today to discuss them, is that alright?"

"Today? Yes, that's fine." Brooke heard herself saying as inside she felt her legs turning to jelly and her stomach muscles clench together.

"Is four alright?"

"Four?" Mouth held up his watch for Brooke to look at, it was currently 2pm.

"Yeah four's fine, see you then."

"Great, I'll see you then, come straight to my office." Brooke heard the tone of the phone as Chase hung up and she too pressed the red button.

"Have you got the results?" Mouth asked taking Brooke's phone from her as she held her stomach, looking queasy.

"Yes, he wants to see me at four."

"Well alright then, lets get you a wig." Mouth was trying to appear up-beat about the whole thing but the truth was he was scared.

_Scared for his friend and her life. Scared for what would happen if everything wasn't alright._

"Mouth, can you help me pick?" Brooke's voice cut through Mouth's musings.

No, he couldn't think like that, especially when Brooke was around. She was going to be ok. Everything was going to be ok.

"What were you thinking?" He asked,

"Well, I need something that's my colour, because I don't want the others questioning it." Brooke pondered the different shades of brunette, trying to match them to a picture of herself.

_Others._ The term made Mouth nauseous, they didn't know, any of them and It wasn't fair, on them, on him or on Brooke. She needed the support despite her being so independent, she needed people to lean on. She couldn't do this alone.

"Mouth, Mouth are you there?" Brooke was smiling up at him and he just didn't know how, he couldn't even fake a smile right now. Yet here Brooke was choosing a wig because she had no hair left and smiling about it.

"What do you think?" Brooke had on a wig that almost matched the exact shade of her old hair and was giving him a twirl, it was a little longer than normal but he didn't think the others would care.

"I love it Brooke, you look exactly the same."

"I do don't I," Brooke giggled and stared at the mirror, shifting the wig a bit to make it look a little less fake.

"I guess this is the one I'm getting." Brooke headed to the counter to pay for her wig the smile still on her face.

The truth was, it was a fake smile, Brooke couldn't smile, not at a time like this, but she needed to stay positive and she needed to convince Mouth that everything was alright and if smiling would do that then that's what she would do.

_Mouth probably couldn't even tell_, she realised. She'd worn the smile so many times, that sometimes she couldn't even tell between her two smiles.

"You look gorgeous in the wig." The cashier a lady in her mid thirties told Brooke who beamed at her.

"You think?"

"No-one would be able to tell." The lady re-assured her.

"But there is something people can tell, if they look closely."

"What?" Brooke was worried now, she couldn't have anyone knowing or even guessing.

"Your smile isn't real." Brooke's smile faltered a little but soon returned.

"What do you mean?"

"Darling, I've dealt with a lot of...different cases, and I know smiles that aren't real and smiles that are, I used to be a nurse you know."

"Mrs—" Brooke searched for a name-tag on the woman.

"Viola," The lady answered

"Viola, you don't know me and I can vouch for the fact I only smile when I am happy and right now I'm happy."

"I may not know you, but I do know others who are like you."

"Can I please have my wig?" Brooke asked crossly as she handed over her credit card.

"You may, but just remember Viola is always here, if you need someone."

Brooke stared strangely at the woman as she exited the store, Mouth following behind her deep in thought.

"What've you got in the bag?" Rachel asked as Brooke walked through the door, biting her lip nervously.

"Nothing!"

"Oh come on, is it lingerie, or is it kinky stuff?" Rachel was bored and right now Brooke was her only entertainment.

"Nothing," Brooke reached up to touch her hair as Rachel stared intently at the bag, checking to make sure that the wig was still positioned correctly.

"You're boring! Sluts are supposed to share stuff with fellow sluts." Rachel pouted as Brooke continued up to the bedroom.

She had 30 minutes before her appointment with Chase and right now she was a walking bag of nerves.

"Be calm, be calm." She muttered to herself as she placed the bag underneath her mattress and straightened up to check her appearance.

It seemed now Brooke had become ...ill she looked in the mirror much more frequently, always checking to make sure she looked presentable; she didn't look to pale, her wig wasn't slipping, she didn't have any noticeable bruises and that she didn't look to frail.

Hearing the horn of Mouth's car, Brooke slowly walked back down to where Rachel sat.

"Where ya going?"

"No-where!"

"Well ya obviously going somewhere if you're leaving the house in a car and with a friend."

"Can I come with you and Mouth.

"No!" Brooke ran out of the house, almost tripping over the few steps that led up to the front door in her haste. Rachel couldn't know where they were going, that would ruin everything. Rachel had the biggest mouth of the century, she'd already started that baby rumour, and if she got hold of anything that pointed to Brooke being...ill then soon everyone would know.

"Drive!" She ordered Mouth as she climbed in to the car and clipped her seatbelt in to place.

The drive to the hospital was mostly silent, apart from the occasional 'are you okay' and response of 'yes' the two teenagers pondered about the different things they were worried about.

"Here you are, do you want me to come in and wait?" Mouth asked Brooke who was visibly shaking.

She nodded and bit her lip as she closed the door to Mouth's car.

"It's going to be ok," Mouth soothed and Brooke attempted to relax as Mouth wrapped an arm around her waist and walked her forward.

"I can't do it," She choked out as they neared the entrance to the hospital.

"Brooke don't worry, just relax, today you will find out how to beat this."

"I'm scared Mouth," Brooke admitted as salty tears appeared at the corners of her eyes.

Mouth was at a loss for words to say. Brooke Davis, the fearless independent teen who had, had her heart broken too many times was admitting that she was scared.

"So am I," Mouth replied, the two children hugged for a while before entering the hospital.

"Go on," Mouth nudged Brooke as he took up a seat in the waiting room, picking up an electronics magazine to tide him over.

With steady footsteps Brooke approached the receptionist and informed her that she was Brooke Davis, Chase's 4 0clock.

"Well go sit down then, he'll call you when it's time." The receptionist told her.

"He said to come straight to his office."

"Miss, I know how things work around here and he will come out and get you when it's time."

"But—" Brooke was cut off by the crackle off the receptionist's walkie-talkie.

'_Glenda, when a Brooke Davis arrives make sure she comes straight to my office, she has orders to._'

"Alright Sir," Glenda glared up at Brooke who had a smug smile on her face.

"You heard him, go on up." Brooke turned away from the desk and gave Mouth a thumbs up, he repeated her gesture and added a loving smile to it.

Knocking on the door to Chase's office, Brooke heard a 'come in' and so with strong hands she pushed open the door and walked in to the room.

"You look very nice Miss Davis," Chase complimented as Brooke sat down in one of the cushiony chairs.

Knowing he was talking about the wig, Brooke touched it briefly before bringing her hands back down to her lap, playing with the hem of her dress.

"You wanted to discuss the results."

"Yes, I did, we have received the results from your biopsy and I want to talk about your options."

"You're first option to removing the tumour is chemotherapy, this is where we give you drugs to kill the tumour cells, usually stopping the cell's ability to grow and divide, then once that process has been completed, you'll be given different drugs to reduce the size of the tumour as well as to stabilize and ease the pain. Chemotherapy is a cycle, it starts off that you will be given one drug or a combination of drugs a week, once we are sure that you are responding to the drugs then we may add two visits a week to your schedule. Chemotherapy for Medulloblastoma can be given orally, intravenously which is an injection in to the vain otherwise known as an IV or by injection to a muscle. However there are side effects to the treatment, including fatigue, a high risk of infection, nausea and vomiting, loss of appetite and diarrhoea, these will usually go away once the treatment has finished."

Brooke shifted in her chair as the doctor continued, she was taking all the information in, this was her only way to survival and Brooke didn't want to die, forever eighteen.

"The second option is surgery which as you know you had during the biopsy, normally I would recommend this first for your type of cancer, but in your case I do not due to the positioning of your tumour."

Brooke nodded.

"The third option is radiation therapy, this can also be combined with the chemotherapy although I recommend you take this first before the chemo it can be done the other way around. Radiation therapy is the use of high energy x-rays to kill tumour cells. The most common type of radiation is called external beam radiation therapy and this is done by a machine outside of the body, the other type is called internal radiation therapy or brachytherapy and this is where implants are placed inside your body to kill the cells. Because of your age you will be allowed to have a moderate dosage to the entire brain and spine followed by a higher dosage aimed directly at the tumour and the surrounding area. Now there are side effects which include fatigue, nausea, mild skin reactions and loose bowel movement. However there are long term effects, which I doubt will happen with you as these are more aimed at children. These are growth development problems, hormone deficiencies, and learning problems, but as I said, you are eighteen a grown woman and so will have no problems with these."

Brooke liked how he said she was a grown woman, often she didn't feel like an adult but the way Chase spoke made her feel much more independent, strong and mature."

"What would you recommend?"

"Well Miss Davis, I would suggest starting with radiation and continuing with chemotherapy."

"Then I will go with that."

"But Miss Davis, you have not had time to think it all over—"

"Chase, you are my doctor and have dealt with my case many more times, I am a teenage girl with not that much time left and so I will go with your decision, now where do I sign."

Chase held out some documents which Brooke scanned over before signing with her swirly signature.

"So I will arrange for your first radiation treatment to be on Tuesday, is that alright Miss Davis?"  
Brooke swallowed. _Four days time_.

"Yes that is alright."

"I suggest you have someone sit with you as it can be very intense, seeing as you are completing your final year of school maybe you should get friends to alternate." Chase smiled at her and opened the door as Brooke stood to leave.

"Maybe" She gave Chase a weak smile and began her walk down to the waiting room.

"How did it go?" Mouth jumped up from his seat as soon as he saw Brooke and took her in to a big hug, knowing that was exactly what she needed.

"I'm, starting radiation and then on to chemotherapy, I start on Tuesday." Brooke told him as she looked over her shoulder.

It was then she noticed the woman from the shop yesterday, sitting holding a sleeping toddler in her arms with a teenage boy sitting next to her. _What was her name again? _Brooke racked her brain.

"Viola!" The woman looked over as Brooke blushed she hadn't mean to say it out loud.

"What was that?" Mouth asked but Brooke was already walking over to the woman.

"Hello again," Viola smiled at Brooke who in return smiled back.

"She's adorable," She motioned to the baby and Viola smiled.

"She's in remission."

"What?"

"This is her second time being in remission."

"Omigod, I'm so sorry," Viola had a small tear at her eye and wiped it quickly.

"It's ok, we manage,"

"Bobby Ray," The receptionist called and the boy around 15 got up, hugged Viola quickly and left the room.

"He's doing his chemotherapy," Viola told Brooke.

"Both of your children—" Viola nodded, "We lost my mom to it too,"

"I'm so sorry," tears were sliding down Brooke's face too.

"I have to go, I'm so sorry," Brooke ran out of the hospital, Mouth right behind her.

"Brooke! Brooke are you ok?"

"That little girl is dying Mouth, she's had cancer twice and she's still strong, me I've had it for a month and I'm crying."

"Brooke it's ok," She sobbed as she hugged him.

Just then Mouth spotted two figures he knew well coming out of the hospital doors and sighed, '_uh oh' _he thought as the brunette clinged to him.

"Mouth!" Mouth heard running footsteps as the couple dubbed 'Naley approached.

"Brooke!" There was another cry as the two got closer.

Brooke sniffled, drying her eyes as she looked up.

"Haley? Nathan?"

"What are you two doing here?" Haley asked, now they were close enough to have a conversation.

"Oh, we were just..."

"Visiting my Uncle Lenny, and Brooke here got a bit emotional."

"What's wrong with him?"

"He has—"

"Glandular fever," Brooke cut in having dried her eyes.

"And I was just thinking what if I had caught it, back when I was kissing random boys." Brooke made up.

"Oh, okay, well we were just visiting the doctor,"

"But didn't you just go?"

"Yeah, but Nathan hasn't been so we got an updated ultrasound photo, do you want to see."

Haley brought out the photo's and showed them to the eager teens, however Brooke was still touchy on the whole dying children thing and her eyes crumpled up at the sight.

"Brookie what's wrong?" Haley asked worriedly as Brooke began crying again.

"We went past the paediatric ward on our way back down." Mouth lied.

"Oh honey," Haley hugged her friend who again sobered up.

"It's alright, it's just children dying, it makes me think of how unfair the world is, you know."

"Yeah I know," Haley replied.

"So do you want a lift?" Mouth asked, aware of the couple's finance situation.

"That would be great man," Nathan thanked Mouth as the couple hopped up in to the car.

"Brooke have you done something with your hair?" Haley asked, noticing the slight difference in colour as the sun shined on it.

"What! No!" Brooke reached up to touch her hair, smoothing it down.

"I was just asking," Haley chuckled.

"So I haven't seen you at school recently, are you okay?"

"I've just been ill, but I'm feeling better now and when Mouth told me how upset he was over his dad, I mean uncle...Lenny, then I wanted to go with him for moral support."  
"Was it because of you're fall?" Nathan queried, "That you were ill,"

"Probably."

"Well this is us," Nathan said as they Mouth pulled up outside their apartment.

"Bye guys," Brooke waved as the two climbed out.

"Well that was awkward," Mouth said as the continued on driving.

"Yeah," It had been awkward, and Brooke had hated it, just over a month ago they were all best friends and now, it seemed they just didn't talk any more, they were in separate worlds.

Brooke, Mouth and Rachel were on one side. Haley, Nathan, Lucas and Peyton on the other, and Brooke didn't like that, in fact she hated it.


	6. You Can't Break A Broken Heart

Chapter Six- You Can't Break A Broken Heart

"**Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could."**

"Party at ours tonight!" Rachel bounded up to Brooke who was currently strutting her way down the hall-way, dressed in her cheerleading uniform with her symbolic captain 'R' mark on her cheek.

"Seriously, Rache," Brooke whined, wanting nothing more than to curl up in bed after this day was over.

"Come on, Fatass, where's your party spirit, you haven't been out in days."

"I'm just not in the mood Slut," Brooke shrugged, opening her locker to store her Government book and pulling out her Calculus textbook.

"When are you not in the mood Whore?"

"Don't question me just get someone else to host the party."

"No can do, everyone knows to come to ours and I've already bought four kegs, this is the quarter finals match, Slut and we know that our boys are going to rock in!"

"We sure are," Nathan and Haley appeared behind Rachel, having heard her last statement.

"Tell Rachel, that she should host the party somewhere else," Brooke turned to her friends hoping to get them on her side.

"Am, I really hearing this, Brooke Davis doesn't want to party?" Nathan looked at Brooke surprise written over his face.

"God! I'm just not in the mood!" Brooke complained.

"Brooke it was just a joke, and come on, it'll be fun, I'll be there too and if you don't feel like drinking we can be sober together." Haley suggested.

"Thanks TutorGirl, but I think I'll be sleeping somewhere else tonight!" Brooke flounced off, throwing one last glare at Rachel before she left.

"Wonder what's stuck up her ass?" Rachel mused as the married couple disappeared down the hall.

*********************************************************************

"Brooke are you not eating?" Peyton noticed the brunette who sat gazing in to the distance obviously in deep thought but with no food in front of her.

"Huh?" Brooke shook her head at Peyton who sighed and offered her half of her sandwich.

"No thanks Peyton," Brooke replied.

"Brooke you can't not eat?" Lucas argued

"I'm not hungry,"

"Just have half of my lunch Brooke, I packed an extra large one."

"Thanks Peyton, but no thanks as I've already said I'm not hungry,"

"Don't tell me you're going all anorexic on us Davis, you didn't eat breakfast either," Rachel paused her conversation with Bevin to confront the fashionista who stared at her hardly.

"As I've already said I'm not hungry and no for the record bitch I'm not anorexic."

"Brooke, we're just worried about you, you had that nasty fall in class and then went home because you were dizzy, you were ill for most of the weekend, and now you're not eating, is something wrong? Something bothering you?" Haley queried, having noted all of Brooke's disappearances lately.

"TutorWife, there's no need to keep tracks on me, I'm perfectly healthy—" She stopped to give Rachel a glare "—And all I had was the flu, I'm fine."

"The flu? You weren't even in bed for most of the day Slut, so tell us, who is so great that you need to become anorexic to impress him, he must be amazing in bed."

All eyes were on Brooke after the last sentence.

"I'm not having sex with anyone, nor am I anorexic, now can we please focus on something else. Like the...insanely cute photographs of my godson."

"Brooke, it's going to be a girl," Nathan stated

"No, Brooke's right I can feel it, it's a boy." Haley butted in, continuing the argument the married couple had been having since Nathan had learned of their unborn child.

"My aunt said she had a horse once," Bevin said cheerily, joining in with the conversation.

They all stared at her until Skills kissed her and the topic was lost.

"So when are you and Peyton gonna get together?" Skills asked making the lunch just a little bit more awkward.

"Peyton and I are friends," Lucas told the table after a minute's silence.

Brooke noticed Peyton's hurt look and tried to amend the situation.

"They just aren't ready to admit their feelings, Lucas having just come out of a relationship, they don't want to jump in, when the time's right, they'll get together."

Lucas sent Brooke a perplexed stare. _Yes she had broken up with him but was she really encouraging him and Peyton to go out?_

"Lucas and I, we will happen in our own time," Peyton concluded firmly.

"We're just friends," Lucas hurried to add for the benefit of the girl who had was about to leave the table. Although he had promised himself to stop fighting, he couldn't help the pain that washed over him at the thought that Brooke was okay with him and Peyton being together. Brooke Davis, the girl who was insecure about everything to do with Lucas and Peyton and hated the idea of them being together was okay with it.

During his pondering, Brooke had begun to walk away and Lucas hurried after her.

"Brooke!" He tugged on her arm turning her around.

"What Lucas?" She was irritable, Lucas could tell and he couldn't help the nagging feeling that told him it was because of him and Peyton.

"What was that back there?"

"What do you mean?" Brooke knew what Lucas was referencing too but she wanted to move on and she couldn't if he just kept dragging up the past.

"Why did you just say that Peyton and I were more than friends?" He asked

"I didn't Luke, I said you had feelings for each other but aren't acting on them yet," Brooke reminded the blonde basketball player.

"But we don't,"

"Not that you know of yet, but I don't see why we are talking about this?"

"Because you gave Peyton and I the all clear." Lucas shouted, drawing attention from near-by students.

"What's wrong with that Lucas, do I have to remind you we are broken up!"

"Ugh!" Lucas spat out frustrated, whilst Brooke ran her hands through her wig.

"Guys why don't we all just calm down," Peyton came over, resting her hands on Lucas's shoulders but he shrugged them off.

"Peyton and I are not together, we have never been together and we won't ever be together," Lucas yelled annoyed.

"Lucas..." A tear slid down Peyton's cheek.

"Peyton," Lucas swivelled on his foot.

"We'll never be together, we never were?" The words came shooting out of Peyton's mouth like daggers, aiming to kill.

"I didn't mean it like that!" He sighed as he now ran his hands through his messy golden locks.

"Brooke and you are over, she broke up with you!" Peyton cried out.

"I thought we had a connection, chemistry you two didn't have," She wailed.

"Peyton, maybe we should take this insi—" Haley was cut off by a loud sob ripping out of Peyton.

"Why can't my love be enough for you?"

Lucas froze. _Peyton was in love with him_.

"Wow Sawyer, you know the best times to confess," Brooke chuckled dryly.

"Well! Are you going to say something?" Peyton looked at the blonde boy who was as still as a statue.

"Peyton...look...maybe we should talk about this inside, where no-one can hear us."

"Typical," Peyton echoed Brooke's humourless laugh.

"Looks like you got what you wanted Brooke, Lucas chose you." Peyton informed her former friend.

"Peyton, can't we be friends, after everything I've done for you," Brooke pleaded.

Peyton pivoted away from Brooke.

"Peyton! If we can be friends, I won't go out with Lucas, I just want things to go back, back to the way they were!" Brooke called.

"Brooke, we've been through too much."

"Too much, do you know what I have done for you! I gave up the love of my life _for _you Peyton, _for_ you." Brooke's voice sounded half-crazed as she begged with her childhood best friend.

"Please," She implored, sounding broken.

But Peyton continued to walk away and Brooke was left with a thousand faces staring at her.

With a strangled sob, Brooke too ran away, away from the school, away from her friends.

"What the Hell was that?" Rachel arrived home and immediately stomped up to her bedroom, ready to confront Brooke.

Bursting in to the room she began shouting, only to find that Brooke wasn't there.

"Damn it Brooke!" She groaned and pulled out her phone intent on calling her room-mate, however he brunette friend didn't pick up either of the times she phoned and so instead she decided to get ready for the game later.

Brooke was curled up underneath the bridge, her legs pulled up to her chest, muffling her sobs.

"What are you doing here?" The curly blonde approached the brunette, having watched her from afar.

There was no answer from Brooke, and so Peyton sat down on the gravel next to her.

"What are you doing here?" There was a sniffle from Brooke as she repeated the same question she had been asked.

"Same as you I guess, I came to think, sort out my head." Peyton told the dishevelled Brooke who had looked up from her legs.

"What happened to make us go so wrong?" Peyton wondered aloud after a moment's silence had passed.

"Lucas Scott," Brooke sighed as she whispered the name.

"We can't fix what we had can we?" A tear leaked out of Brooke's eye as she realised the truth.

"No, but we can make something new." Peyton gave a sad smile as the wind ruffled their hair.

"I don't know if I can," Brooke told her former friend who nodded in agreement.

"I mean, I know I told you I wanted to be friends earlier but I wasn't thinking straight, we've been through two much Sawyer, I've spent too much time crying over you." Brooke's raspy voice cracked as she spoke the words both of them hadn't wanted to hear.

"We can still say hi to each other in the hallway right?" Peyton asked her curly mop falling in to her eyes as she trembled.

"Sure Sawyer," Brooke leaned forward and the two shared a warm hug.

"I'm gonna miss you Brooke." Peyton whimpered as she let go of Brooke.

"As I'm gonna miss you Peyton, don't be a stranger."

"I won't!" Peyton promised.

"Now go get the love of your life." Brooke urged her.

"He's not mine to love," Peyton paused as she compiled her thoughts.

"Brooke, Lucas loves you and he always will do, he was never mine, I just clung on to him because the love of my life wasn't here. I was jealous of the relationship you two had and I was jealous of someone knowing you better than I do." Peyton admitted.

"You mean everything I did for you, everything I've done for you was because you were jealous!" Brooke's eyes flashed.

"Brooke I'm sorry,"

"Sorry doesn't cut it Sawyer, I gave him up for you, I made myself unhappy because I loved you too much." Brooke stood up quickly, dusting the dirt off of her jeans.

"Brooke! Wait!" Peyton got up too but Brooke held up her hand.

"Don't follow me…I need time." Brooke marched off, her heels clacking against the ground loudly.

"Where's Brooke!" Haley asked Rachel as they entered the changing room.

"How the Hell am I supposed to know, she's gone off on her own." Rachel crossed her arms irritated at her room-mate who had disappeared.

"She'll be here soon." Peyton strode in to the room her gym bag smacking the side of her leg as she walked.

"What are you doing here Goldilocks?" Rachel sneered at the blonde.

"I'm on the team Whore," Peyton reminded Rachel who wrinkled her nose in disgust.

"Why are you even showing your face around here, no-one wants you, not even your saviour Lucas Fucking Scott."

"Stop it Rachel," Haley reprimanded the red-head liking her no-more than Peyton did.

"Oh shut it Haley , do you know what this home wrecker has done to Brooke."

"And since when did you care about Brooke!" Peyton cocked her hip and advanced forward ready for a face-off.

"Enough!" There came a cry from the entrance of the locker-room and Brooke Davis made her appearance.

"Brooke where the fuck have you been?"

"Must have had you worried Bitch, you never call me Brooke!" Brooke approached the gang of three.

"Brooke," Peyton murmured quietly but Brooke turned away from her, looking in the mirror to check her appearance.

"Are you ok Brooke?" Haley asked quietly, trying not to draw attention to them.

"I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" Brooke gave Haley her perfected smile and clapped her hands to gather the group.

"Who's ready to cheer girls!"

"And kick some Black Swans ass!" One of the girls called out and they all clapped in approval.

"Let's go welcome the boys then!" Brooke led them out of the door, peering in the mirror one last time to reassure herself that her smile was still there.

"Go Ravens go!" The cheerleaders shouted as the boys ran on to the court. As the game started the girls got in line and began to cheer.

"To the start of this day  
We'll bring you something new,  
We are (name of team),  
We will conquer you,  
So go and run away,  
We will run after you!"

The girls shook their pom-poms up and down cheering on their team and watching as the Black Swans continued to score.

By Half-Time the Ravens were losing badly and most of them were in a bad mood.

"Come on girls let's spice this game up a bit, give the boys and eyeful!" Brooke winked at Rachel who smirked and together they led the girls on to the court and began dancing.

Everyone turned to watch them, receiving a sharp tap from Whitey, who needed them to focus.

There was a whistle blown after the girls had completed their last move, signalling that half-time was over.

"Alright girls, lets cheer!" Brooke raised her pom-poms as she skipped back to the edge of the court.

"Get up,  
Get down,  
Pass that ball around  
Because you know we'll be #1"

The girls motivated the boys spurring them on.

With five minutes to go the cheerleaders switched to their last cheer, directed by Brooke.

"Hey! Hey! It's time to fight  
Everybody yell blue and white  
BLUE AND WHITE!  
Hey! Hey! Let's do it again  
Everybody yell GO! FIGHT! WIN!  
Go, Fight, Win!  
Go, Fight, Win!"

"Blue and white. We're gonna fight!" Brooke cried, throwing herself in to the moment.

With one minute left to go Lucas chased the opposing dribbler down the court, retrieved the ball and passed it back up court to Skills.

Skills then faked going left to throw it to Nathan on his right who aimed for the basket and jumped.

The crowds were deafening as the Ravens realised they were going on to the Semi Finals.

"Nathan!" Haley gave a delighted shriek and ran to congratulate her husband.

Bevin too rushed to give her boyfriend a hug whilst Rachel left to mingle.

Peyton deliberated her choices, deciding to hide out in the changing rooms until the hub-bub has settled down .

However her plans for hiding were thwarted when she discovered Brooke in the middle of changing.

"Oh!" Her response was quiet but Brooke saw her reflection in the mirror and turned instantaneously.

"Peyton, this isn't what it looks like," Brooke grabbed her wig and stuffed it back on to her bald head..

"What happened to your hair Brooke?" Peyton asked confused by Brooke's lack of it.

"Burnt it off," Brooke suggested with a nervous giggle.

Peyton narrowed her eyes.

"Fine, I was in a bad mood, I cut it wildly and when I went to the hairdressers she said the only way to fix it was to shave my head."Brooke lied, swivelling to pack her blue gym bag.

"Don't lie to me Brooke, I can tell you know."

Brooke gave a harsh laugh, "You can tell! Peyton that is a shitty lie and you know it, you've never seen through my lies so don't think you can now."

"You didn't say that you didn't lie just now though," Peyton claimed triumphantly.

"God Peyton, just leave me alone."

"No, cause I want to know why you're suddenly missing all of your hair, turning up late to school and cutting class?"

"It doesn't matter Sawyer, it's none of your business."

"Are you whoring around again?" Peyton blocked Brooke's exit.

"Am I whoring around again? I never did Peyton! How could you, I thought you were my friend, I guess you never stopped being a backstabbing bitch!" Brooke snapped shoving Peyton out of the way.

"Just tell me the reason God dammit!"

"You want to know, you want to know the reason," Brooke rounded, her eyes blazing.

"The reason is I'm fucking dying Peyton that's the reason!"

The two girls were shell-shocked. Brooke because she had just admitted her biggest secret to her ex- backstabbing best friend. And Peyton because…Brooke had just told her she was dying.

Unaware of the chilly atmosphere the rest of the cheerleaders piled in to the locker rooms, chatting noisily.

"Don't tell me there was another bitch-fest in here!" Rachel spoke up loudly, noticing the two girls who appeared frozen.

Brooke gave a tiny whimper, picked up her gym bag and dashed out of the room.

"Brooke!" Rachel rushed to the entrance, looking for the sight of her brunette best friend but she had disappeared.

"Nice going Sawyer," She glared at the curly blonde who Haley had approached.

"Don't Rachel, just don't!" Haley gave Rachel a look that could have terrorised half of the kids in North Carolina and Rachel surprisingly 'shut up'.

Peyton was worried; after Brooke's confession she had run off and no-one had seen her since.

After leaving the school, Peyton had driven to Rachel's house planning on accosting Brooke but on arrival she had realised that Rachel was hosting a party.

Pushing her way through the drunken basketball players had been easy; finding Rachel was not.

Eventually the tortured artist walked in on Rachel making out with a member of the opposing team upstairs.

Disgusted Peyton had hauled Rachel off of the boy and dragged her outside.

After being told what a slutty bitch she was Peyton had asked Rachel where Brooke was only to find out Brooke hadn't returned yet. Leaving Rachel with her boy-toy Peyton had hurried out of the door and driven down to the bridge, discovering that Brooke was not there either.

She had then driven around the town searching for a sign of Brooke, checking both Tric and Karen's Café, before she stumbled across Brooke's favourite bar The Blue Post. However she had no such luck finding Brooke, especially since her ID wasn't even listed as Brooke Davis.

Panicking Peyton had decided to call Lucas, thinking that Brooke could be lying half-dead somewhere in a ditch by now.

Lucas had excused himself from the party and informed Peyton to meet him at the river-court, thinking she wanted to talk.

Finally Peyton could see the figure of a blonde athlete and thanking heaven for creating such a hero as Lucas Scott was she climbed out of the car.

"Look Peyton, can I start this off by saying I'm not interested in you like that?" Lucas said bluntly.

"Lucas I didn't call you here to talk about my confession." Peyton proclaimed, feeling slightly hurt at the abruptness of his words."

"Oh!" Lucas rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment.

"What did you call me here for then?"

"Brooke's missing!" Peyton blurted.

"What?"

"Brooke, we had a massive fight and no-one's seen her since the game," Peyton admitted.

"She's not missing-missing, Peyton, she's just blowing off steam," Lucas said objectively.

"No, this is different!"

"How is it different?" Lucas cocked an eyebrow.

"Brooke…told me something,"

"Told you what?" Lucas queried inquisitively.

"I…can't tell you,"

"Are you sure she's missing?" Lucas appraised Peyton's scared expression.

"Yes! She's not at Rachel's house nor at our special place. She's not at Tric, your mums or The Blue Post, I don't know where else to look."

"The beach?" Lucas proposed thoughtfully.

"Why would Brooke be at the beach?" Peyton asked curiously.

"It's her favourite place!"

Peyton was perplexed; although Lucas and Brooke had been together she had thought she was Brooke's best friend. How had she not known that Brooke's favourite spot was the beach,"

"Don't worry about it Peyton, I may be wrong," Lucas wrapped an arm around the blonde comfortingly as she reflected upon her relationship with Brooke.

"You're probably right, let's just go," Peyton opened up her car-door and revved the engine, waiting for Lucas.

Brooke watched the midnight blue waves crash on to the shore, rising with every splash.

So calm, were the waves; they helped her to think, to re-order her jumbled thoughts and get her head in to the right mind-set.

'_Why did she have to die?'_ Brooke didn't want to die she realised, not so young.

'_I don't want to feel this pain anymore, I want to feel _numb' Brooke stared out at the waves, wondering if they could wash away her pain.

With trembling fingers Brooke eased herself off of the gooey wet sand and ventured closer to the frothy waves that bounced off the sea-shore. Slowly she slipped off her sneakers, leaving them to make a mark in the sand as she neared the waves.

Closer she walked until the tips of her toes were underneath the cool water.

'_It was cold, freezing in fact'_ but Brooke liked it, she could feel it. Feel the pulse of her heart as it raced to warm her up. Feel the pounding of her head as it beat in time with the roaring waves. Feel her feet numbing, becoming frozen; like ice.

She didn't need to travel any further, the waves came to her. Lapping at her feet first, followed by her ankles, until the tide had come so far in that both of her knees were covered.

Brooke had no sense of time or direction as she plunged in deeper, letting the water rush over her thighs, covering her cheer skirt and the top half of her body.

She heard a clamour from the edge's water but didn't pause to think about it as she stumbled on a large rock and submerged her head.

She felt like she was drifting underneath, floating in the wintry waters.

"Brooke!" More bellows were heard and the sound of someone diving in to the water followed.

Brooke found herself being lifted up, elevated by someone. All of a sudden her head was above water and she was moving towards the edge of the sea.

Sand soon found her and the person who had saved her leant over her body anxiously.

"Wake up!" He shook her frantically, desperately trying to hear her heartbeat.

He had already called 911, upon seeing Brooke's lifeless figure bobbing up and down in the sea.

Knowing little of CPR, the boy began pumping her body, trying fervently to hear her pulse.

After fifty pumps the boy turned his attention to Brooke's cherry red lips, opening them so that he could breathe for her.

Carefully he inhaled and exhaled in to Brooke's mouth, needing for her to wake up.

After much breathing, the boy finally heard the wail of ambulance sirens, and gratefully wrapping Brooke's soaking body in his jumper he stood to attract attention. He began waving his hands in the air and jumping, waiting for a sign of recognition from the drivers. Finally the boy could see the large vehicle driving down the strip of beach and four nurses ran out.

They lifted Brooke's fragile figure on to a stretcher and led her in to the ambulance motioning for the boy to jump up beside her.

He did so and the ambulance set off, the nurses attaching masks to Brooke's face whilst the sirens shrieked out their emergency screech.

"No-one's here!" Lucas sighed disappointingly as he and Peyton reached the stretch of beach that Brooke usually sat on.

"So now where should we look?" Peyton questioned nervously.

"I don't know," Lucas looked worryingly at Peyton.

Just as they got up to leave, Peyton noticed something, shining under the light of the mood.

"Wait! What's that?" Peyton ran closer realising that the object in question was Brooke's gym shoes.

Lucas gazed at them, swallowing hard before looking at to the sea.

"You don't think?"

"No she wouldn't have," Peyton too glanced at the stormy waters.

"But what if…?"

"Brooke!" Peyton gasped, lurching forward as if she was going to jump in to the sea.

"No! Peyton!" Lucas reached forward and held Peyton back.

"I'll go!" Lucas let go of Peyton once she was sure she wasn't going to do anything stupid and tore of his shirt.

He kicked off his trainers and undid his jeans, shimmying out of them at record speed.

"Lucas! Don't do this!" Peyton attempted to stop him.

"I came out of the last one alive," He reminded her before running in to the sea and slipping under the murky waters.

Five minutes passed and occasionally Peyton could see Lucas's head bobbing up for air.

She had moved back considerably as the tide was moving fast and Lucas took a while to come back.

"No sign of her," He breathed as he appeared from the dark, his boxers drenched.

"Here!" Peyton handed him his trousers and top which he shrugged on, not caring that he would get them wet too.

"She either didn't go in, or she's…." Lucas trailed off not daring to say the last word.

"She can't be!" Peyton argued against what her mind was saying, her heart not believing it was true.

"What do we do now?" She asked the blonde-boy as he tugged Peyton up off the sand

"I don't know, I just don't know."

Arriving back at Peyton's car the two teens checked the phone's hoping for a message from Brooke, instead it was flooded with missed calls from Haley, Nathan and Mouth.

"They're probably wondering where we are," Lucas told Peyton as he rang up Haley.

"Lucas thank goodness you answered," Hale answered the incoming phone call as she paraded the hospital corridor anxiously.

"Sorry we left the party Hales," She heard down the phone and she sighed.

"I don't care that you left the party, but why haven't you been answering your phones,"

"Because we were looking for Brooke," Haley's heart skipped a beat at the last name.

"We?" She asked noticing the term in Lucas's sentence.

"Peyton and I!" Lucas replied.

"Oh!"

"So why did you so urgently need to talk to me?"

"Because…Brooke's in hospital." Haley bit her thumb as she heard the volley of outcry's that came from the other end, Lucas had obviously relayed the information to Peyton.

"Can you get here as soon as possible please!" She told Lucas who promised that Peyton had already started driving.

Ending the conversation Haley bit her lip nervously and returned to her husband.

"Did you tell them?" He asked.

"Yeah, he and Peyton are on their way.

"So he's finally chosen," Nathan nodded his head as if expecting it.

"What do you mean?"

"Well after that big love triangle fight this afternoon Lucas has finally chosen Peyton to be his only and only."

"I don't know, Lucas told me they were searching for Brooke!" Haley told her husband.

"I swear those three don't even speak any-more why would they be looking for Brooke?"

"How am I supposed to know Nathan?"

"I bring coffee," A dishevelled Mouth entered the room, laden down with a tray full of coffee.

"Well done Mouth," There was a round of applause.

"You did a really good job Mouth," Haley congratulated the boy.

"Yeah man, you might have saved Brooke's life tonight."


	7. Poll

&I have just created a new poll titled "Who Shall Be Brooke's Love Interest In "An Angel's Kiss"

It would be great if you could vote. As a little incentive the quicker you vote and the more people that vote the quicker I'll be able to finish this last chapter.

I did already write the chapter and was about to post it when my computer crashed and I lost all of my recent work. Then whilst I was in the process of re-writing it I realised that I shouldn't write one of the parts about her love interest when I wasn't sure who you guys wanted.

I have had a lot of reviews telling me not to make this a Brucas Story and instead involve Clay or Jake. What do you think?

So I need you to vote on the poll otherwise I will simply choose one of the characters and you may not like it and so you may have read this story for nothing.

I don't want this to happen and so have created a poll.

Options

Lucas Scott

Jake Jagielski

Clay Evans

Julian Baker

Owen Morello (Not that i really want to write him in)

Or Own Character

*Update*

Ok So A Lot Of You Haven't Been Able To Vote On The Poll On FanFiction And So I Have Created One Elsewhere

www . learnmyself personality . asp?p= take-poll&qp= 87147xf99 44136#

Of Course I Am Aware That Links Often Don't Show Up In FanFiction And So There Is A Direct Link On My Facebook Page

Which Is Then facebook url /jessyejesigirl

So I Hope You All Go And Vote As I Have Made It So You Can Vote As Many Times As You Want And That You Can See The Poll Vote

I Know A Lot Of You Will Not Read This Story After The Romance Interest Has Been Decided Due To Not Liking The Character And I Respect That.

This Is Why If I Do Not Get Enough Votes On The Poll To Decided The Romance Interest I Simply Won't Include Them. The Character May Appear And May Profess Their Love But Brooke Will Not Act On It As I Do Not Want To Lose Readers.

So If You Want Brooke To Fall In Love With Your Chosen Character Get Voting It's A Fierce Competition.

If You Need Help With The Link Simply PM Me Or Email Me At

fortitudeandlove

XOX JessyeJesigirl

Poll So Far

Lucas Scott- 5 - 33%

Julian Baker- 5 - 33%

Jake Jagielski- 4 - 27%

Clay Evans- 1 - 5%

Owen Morello- 0

Own Character- 0

Other- 0

No Romance- 0

ps. Just Take Away The Spaces in he URL


	8. Author Note

Author Note

Ok, so obviously that poll link was a little complicated and hard to find, so not many of you voted by it.

Others however sent reviews and I have uploaded that data to a new poll. I know, I know a lot of polls, why don't I just decide who the love interest is by myself.

I think this is a little unfair though, you guys have willingly read 6 chapters of mine and given some lovely reviews and I think the least I can do is give you a chance to decide who the love interest is.

So I have created a new poll which is much easier to find.

Of course as usual you can find it on my JessyeJesigirl facebook page which is

The Facebook url /JessyeJesigirl

Or you can find it straight at.

Poll Daddy Url which is (Minus the spaces) WWW. PollDaddy Poll /6423291

I know a lot of you don't like doing the polls but if you want input on who the love interest is then click there.

Because otherwise a lot of you are going to stop reading this book because you don't like who Brooke ends up with and will have wasted your time.

From the last poll the results came out as

Julian- 7 votes

Lucas- 5

Jake 4

Clay-1

I have not acted on these results but instead I am slowly introducing the characters. Seeing as Julian came out on top his character has been introduced, not as a love interest but as a friend however that may change.

If you want your character to at least be introduced (If they are not already in the story) They must have 7 votes or more.

I have allowed you to repeatedly vote so you can get your character up to 7 votes easily.

Please, please, please vote. Imagine my disappointment when I see the number of people reading this story has gone up yet only five people voted on the poll and a handful of you gave me reviews.

So please vote!

If you have trouble with the link email me at Fortitudeandlove Googlemail. Com

Or facebook me or tweet me (JessyeJesigirl)

I will always answer you. Please vote. Otherwise there will be no romance (Which is a poll option)

XXXX JessyeJesigirl

Ok now that rant is over.

After this there will be a chapter 7 uploaded. *Cheers* It is extra long so I hope you like it.

*Teaser*

Lucas admits his feelings

Peyton tries to get her friendship back

Does Brooke have monophobia?

Haley and Nathan are good friends?

Will Brooke be able to thank Mouth?

Who is Julian?

Rachel takes them on a trip away!

Chase stays the night?

Nathan knows what his food pipe is called!

Haley Swears!

~O0O~

"Who's this Brooke?" Rachel eyed Julian who had now recovered from his small breakdown earlier.

"Just a friend," Brooke waved her hand airily, noticing Lucas clear jealousness.

"Just a friend huh?" Lucas eyes had darkened.

"God Lucas, yes, and what do you care?" Brooke glared at the blonde haired boy who cooled down considerably.

"You're right, what do I care." He shoved off Peyton's hold and stalked out of the cafeteria.


	9. Waking Up

Chapter Seven- Waking Up

"Wake up and live" – Bob Marley

"_Brooke, you need to wake up! We all need you! We miss you so badly. Our baby needs his loveable cuddly godmother who bounces off the walls and enters the room with a cheerful smile. We need your amazing fashion sense and cute idioms. Please Brooke, you can't just leave us. We all love you so much and we don't want to let you go—we can't let you go! We know now, about your...cancer and we want to help. We will help. I know you didn't tell us because you're independent and you feel like you don't need us. But you do, just like we need you and we will be your shoulder to lean on throughout everything. You will get better, Brooke, I believe that but first you need to wake up. So please wake up Tigger. Just open one of those eyes and let us see you. I need my best friend back. Please Brooke!"_

A sobbing girl clutched at her best friends hand as she lay motionless in the sterile white room. The loud beeping machines kept up the girl's constant hope that her friend was going to get better yet as the days went by she lost her faith. Realising she had fallen asleep the chestnut haired girl looked up at her surroundings and her face fell as she remembered the situation. Picking up her discarded bag the girl stood and walked out of the room. Pausing only for a second to glance at the brunette whose chest moved slightly. 'Trick of the light' the girl thought and exited letting another visitor pass by.

It had been a week since Brooke Davis had been admitted in to hospital and declared that her current state was comatose. Since then her friends who had been eager to find out about her current status learnt of her deadly illness and were at a loss for words. So much that they did not return to visit the sleeping girl until a week later. Many of them were too scared to say the word out loud and some of them hadn't dared to think about it since the doctor had informed them. But it was still there. Lurking in the background and none of them could change it. Especially if Brooke did not wake up.

~O0O~

"_Hey Brooke, how you holding up? We all miss you Brooke, why would you go and do a thing like that? Yeah you could say it was a stupid reckless impulsive mistake but I know it was more than that Brooke. We've been through a lot; we both have messed up parents and turned to alcohol and sex to drown the problems out. Hell I even tried adrenaline rushes to cure my pain. But it didn't work, it never did. However we swore we would never do a thing like this. Something that could get us killed. We swore no matter how much anger and pain we felt we would come to each other and talk instead of trying to numb it in some ridiculous suicide plan. Seriously Brooke. What the Hell were you thinking? I get that you have…cancer and now things are a whole lot worse, I don't even want to think about it. But that does not mean you give up, it doesn't mean you turn away from your friends and make out like it's not there. Because no matter what it still will be Brooke, and unless you learn that you are going to do something that you can't be saved from. That you won't be able to survive and that scares all of us. It hurts all of us, impacts all of us. So you need to get your head screwed on straight Brooke because we're going to be here no matter what and we are going to get you through this together. So the least you can do is start fighting!"_

The raven haired senior squeezed the sleeping girls hand tightly before dropping a quick kiss on her forehead. Standing he nodded to the boy who was watching the interaction intently as he sat in the corner of the room. As he began to move across the room the teen could have sworn he saw the girl's eyelashes flutter but blamed it on the dust that was blown around the room and left allowing a nurse to pass by.

Another day had passed and still there was no sign of the brunette waking up. Her friends had been informed that unless she had woken up within 5 months there would be no point as to keep her on life support as the tumour would have spread and there would be no chance of chemotherapy or radiation to keep her alive. 7 months, that's all Brooke Penelope Davis had until she died and her friends were all pleading frantically with her to wake up before it was too late.

~O0O~

"_You did it Brooke Davis; you helped me get over my fear. I just never thought it would be because of this. God if only Lucas and I had gotten to the beach 30 minutes earlier. None of this would have happened. God if only I'd stopped you from leaving the locker room. _

_Brooke I'm so sorry. I know you shouldn't have to be lying in hospital for me to say this but god I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being such a Bitch. I'm sorry for being a horrible friend. I'm sorry for betraying you. I'm sorry for not fighting to be your best friend. I'm so sorry. I know Ellie and Anna are not excuses for my behaviour. Neither is my falling out with Jake and screwed up relationship with Pete. But God I'm sorry. _

_I shouldn't have kissed Lucas in the library; he was just there you know. He was always there, and I thought I was dying. I just wanted to know what made him so loveable, what drew him to you. How you could love him as much as you love me when you've known me longer than him. I know that I cannot apologise for what went down on the day I told you I was in love with…Lucas but I will try. Brooke I know how selfish and backstabbing that was of me and I'm not even entirely sure I'm in love with Lucas…But Jake had turned my proposal down and told me I was muttering Lucas in my sleep. I couldn't bear to tell him I was having nightmares. Nightmares of our kiss together and ruining your relationship together. I didn't tell him because he'd rejected me, I didn't want to seem desperate, no-one does. Not with the person you love. I didn't even think about the situation myself, didn't dare to in case I blurted it out. It was just an accident, all a stupid misunderstood accident. But then, then I started thinking about Jake's concept that I was in love with Lucas and I couldn't get it out of my mind leaving me to believe I was still in love with Lucas. _

_But the thing is Brooke I don't know what I want. Lucas is so kind to be, loving but we're friends and I don't have the attraction I did when you guys were first together and he's in love with you Brooke. Lucas Scott is in love with you. Now Jake, my heart aches for him so badly and I miss his daughter so much. Jake, just his name makes me smile and his gorgeous face is all I ever draw now. But then he rejected me, he doesn't think my love is enough and he's already left me. He left me but I still think I love him. I don't know. I just don't know Brooke. I'm gonna be really deep here and ask what the Hell is love? Nathan and Haley seem in love but I don't feel for Jake what Haley feels for Nathan. Theirs seem so epic, so right and natural. Jake and I we feel messy but we fit. Two puzzled pieces. You and Luke, you guys are so passionate and your eyes are always shining and you are smiling when you're together, your aura's scream love. But I don't know. _

_Brooke this is why I need you. Need you to help me figure it out. What the Hell I want. I'm lost without you B Davis, I need you. I need you to fight because I can't lose another person. Certainly not one of the most important ones. Brooke, Cancer killed my mother but it won't kill you too because I'm going to make sure it won't. Now you just need to open your eyes and I know you're with me."_

The curly blonde haired girl peered up at the pretty face of her best friend expectantly, willing her to wake up. But she didn't and the blonde's face fell, her heart slowing down as she realised that Brooke wasn't waking up. With a soft sigh, the blonde bent to retrieve her sketch book and opened it up to the most recent page. Hearing footsteps, she turned and was faced with the eyes of the boy who had sat in this room for 10 days straight. He was staring at her drawing quietly. Closing I hurriedly the blonde stuffed it inside of her black messenger bag and stood quickly. The boy had already retreated to his seat as she exited and was busily thinking of the picture he had just seen and so the two ignored the slight cough that was made by the brunette.

Brooke had now been asleep for ten days and her friends had fervently tried to contact her parents but to no avail. The Davis' were either travelling or simply did not care to answer their desperate calls. They had no idea that their daughter was battling her life in the hospital or that she was at war with a terminal illness that had a 62% chance of killing her.

~O0O~

"_Brooke, I can't believe that you're...I'm sorry for not visiting I just needed to wrap my head around it, get my thoughts clear so I could talk to you without breaking down or getting angry. I'm here now though and I want you to know that, that I love you. So much and that I'm going to be there every step of the way during your fight against…cancer. We're all going to be there and I know my mom will too. She loves you so much as do I. I never stopped Brooke. It was always you and I'm so sorry about that kiss with Peyton but are you really over me? I just have to ask because I'm not over you and I think we could still make it. We still have a chance, one that I'm willing to take. I know that you're insecure and that you're fighting this massive battle and might not be willing to take on a relationship but I'll wait. I promise you. I know I didn't fight last time but I will this time. I will always fight for you and I'm sorry it took me this long for me to know that this was the way to do things probably. You need to wake up Brooke because you need to survive. You have to survive, everyone needs you. I need you. You are loved Brooke and you need to fight but first pretty girl you need to open those beautiful hazel eyes of you. You are my cheery and I know you may not feel like that now but you can be as long as you wake up. So please Brooke, wake up!"_

The broody blonde haired boy kissed the brunette's hand before kissing her forehead softly. He clutched her hand tightly to his chest as he breathed in deeply, not wanting to leave. Hearing a knock on the door he turned to find the nurse coming in, ready to do her nightly rounds. She addressed the two boys and politely asked them to leave. They did so and the blonde soon found himself outside of the hospital room in which Brooke slept peacefully. The nurse left too soon after. No-one was there to see the sleeping girls head toss from side to side.

Brooke had been comatose for 11 days now and there was still no sign that she was waking up. The others were losing their minds and so Principal Turner had permitted absence from school for two weeks, to compose themselves. After that they would be required to attend their classes although they all knew that they would not be able to focus until their best friend was awake.

~O0O~

"Water," The voice was croaky and dry but there was no mistaking the definite raspy tone. Mouth was shocked out from his slumber at the sound. Sure he was used to his friends coming in to visit and talking to Brooke but the loud voice was new. It was different and it put a smile on his face.

"Brooke," He whispered rushing over to the bed and pressing the red button labelled assistance to alert the doctors.

"Mouth," The raspy voice breathed as the girl's hazel eyes flickered open and caught sight of the familiar basketball announcer.

However her gaze was torn when two doctors opened the door, accompanied by two nurses.

Mouth took this opportunity to step out of the room and call his friends to inform them of Brooke's awakening.

"Is she ok?" The four friends Mouth had come to know and love came speeding down the hall just as he flipped open his phone to call them.

"How did you guys get here so quickly?" Mouth questioned as the all crowded around him.

"Oh we had the receptionist keep tabs and alert us, we were already on our way so we simply ran up here," Haley explained as she leaned in to her husband's side, using him as support so she could catch her breath.

"Thank God she woke up," The tortured artist sighed with relief as the doctors came out of the room.

"As you all seem to know Brooke Davis is now awake, she is allowed two visitors at a time as usual and will be released in two days if all her vitals are correct," One of the white coat doctors told the teens who thanked him gratefully.

"Can we go first?" Haley tugged Nathan in to Brooke's room not waiting for a reply.

~O0O~

"Bookie!" Haley zoomed over to the bed that her best friend was on and drew up a chair, placing herself on to it.

"Hey Brooke," Nathan stood behind Haley's chair as he greeted his friend.

"Brooke, I can't believe you're finally awake, we've all been missing you so much."

Brooke didn't answer them.

"Brooke, we're going to be here for you, you know. We're always here for you and we're going to help you fight."

Brooke's eyes widened as she took in what Haley was talking about.

"You know!" Her voice went exceedingly high on the last word and Nathan winced at the change in octave.

"Brooke, the doctors they had to know about your condition and of course your parents don't know, it's not like they're ever here to know but we are and we're going to help you," Nathan stated firmly.

"Imagine our pain when we couldn't tell them anything Brooke, when they asked about your…cancer and we couldn't tell them!" Tears bubbled up inside of Haley's eyes as she filled the silence.

"I'm sorry," Brooke's voice cracked as she said the words.

"What for?"

"I think it's best if you leave," She informed the two waving them out of the room.

"Excuse me!" The married couple demanded to know the reason for Brooke's cold shoulder.

But they were met with a Brooke's back as she rolled over and stared blankly at the wall.

"Brooke—" Haley begged but Nathan pulled her out of the room.

"Give her time Hales, give her time."

"But," Her expression was desolate and answered by a loving kiss.

"Come on, we'll come back tomorrow, everything will be different then."

~O0O~

"Hey Brooke," Peyton approached her ex-best friend who was swathed in blankets.

"I heard your speech," Brooke muttered and Peyton inhaled sharply.

"So you know how sorry I am."

"Whatever," Brooke snapped moodily, not facing the blonde.

"Brooke please, I want to help you, you're my best friend."

"Not any more Peyton! I can't keep dealing with your backstabbing and epiphany's. I don't like your constant bitchiness and non best friend behaviour. It's not fair to me."

"I'll change, I promise, I'm not in love with Lucas any-more. I want things to go back; I want to be your best friend again!"

"We can't go back! You're unsure remember, uncertain." Brooke reminded the blonde bitterly.

"I'm not, I'm not unsure, I know what I want Brooke and I want your friendship. I want to help you fight against your illness. I can't lose another person. Especially you. People always leave," Peyton murmured the last part but Brooke's acute ears picked up on it.

"People always leave Peyton? Or you drive them away?" Brooke asked cattily.

"Brooke—don't be like this—we've been through too much,"

"Yes we have been through too much, which is why I'm putting stop to this before my heart has been shattered so minutely that it is impossible to piece together again." Brooke admitted, giving Peyton a tear filled look as she rolled back over.

"Now please can you go? I want to be alone!" Brooke shooed the tortured artist who exited quietly.

"I'll be back," She promised as she let the door swing to.

~O0O~

"Hey Brooke, Peyton said you heard what she told you, does that mean you heard my speech too?" Lucas queried hopefully as he entered the hospital room.

"No," Brooke replied shortly as she let the sound of his voice soothe her.

"Ok, I'll just tell you again," Lucas grabbed a hold of the plastic blue chair that sat in the corner and sat on it, moving closer to the bed.

"I'm not really in the mood Luke."

"Brooke I know you think that we're all freaked out by your illness but we're not. I know I speak with everyone when I say this, we are all here for you and we are going to help you fight. Whether that means attending your radiation or chemotherapy appointments, holding your hand as you are injected, holding your hair up whilst you vomit or simply being there."

"Just get out Luke, I want to be alone."

"That's the thing, you're never alone. We all love you, me especially. Brooke I know you say that you don't miss me anymore but I don't think that's true and I know for me it's not. I'm still madly, crazily in love with you and I think I always will be. Peyton may have made you insecure but there is no reason to be. You are perfect, so annoyingly perfect and I love you so much. I want to hug you all the time and kiss those soft cherry lips of yours. I want to wipe your tears away when you're sad and smile with you when you're happy. I'm the guy for you Brooke Davis and I always will be just as you are the girl for me," Lucas finished his speech.

"Lucas—" Brooke had nothing to say, what do you say to the guy who just poured his heart out for you?

"Brooke—"Lucas's heart was pounding, waiting to hear the words that he desperately wanted to hear.

"I think it's best if you leave, I need to rest," Brooke finished and watched as Lucas's face fell considerably.

"But Brooke—"

"Lucas this is too much, I need time to think. I need space, can you please leave!" Brooke ordered irritably her own heart sinking as she Lucas stood and exited without looking back.

~O0O~

"So sleeping beauty decided to wake up," Rachel strode over to Brooke's bed and ripped off the covers that were hiding her face.

"What the Hell!" Brooke shouted, trying fervently to cover her tear-streaked face.

"Brooke," Rachel's features softened at the sight of her best friend; she looked so vulnerable, lying there in no make-up and tired, she had deep black bags under both of her eyes.

"What did I tell you about crying over them," Rachel's face was full of scorn now, as she took in Brooke's raw red eyes.

"Not to," Brooke murmured.

"What was that? What did I tell you?"

"To not cry, to not cry over people who had caused me pain!" Brooke yelled back, her body shaking.

"Good! Now follow that advice please," Rachel placed the covers back on Brooke, making sure not to cover her head.

Perching on the edge of the bed, Rachel sighed as she realised Brooke was in the hospital _again _and that soon it would become a second home to her.

"I'm not going to talk about the big C today but I as soon as you are discharged we will talk!" Rachel told Brooke sternly who nodded gratefully.

"But what I will discuss with you is what the Hell you were thinking when you decided to go for a dip in the freezing ocean at freaking night time."

"As if you and some fellow cronies didn't go skinny dipping in it a few weeks back," Brooke scoffed.

"Yeah but I wasn't alone and I didn't go out as far as you did. I mean seriously Brooke you were no way near the shallow end."

"I was going for a swim, you can't go for a swim in the shallow end," Brooke bluffed.

"Oh, so you just for a swim fully clothed then?" Rachel arched an eyebrow, her eyes set on the floundering Brooke.

"I took off my shoes," Brooke leaned down to point at a pair of soggy gym trainers to prove her point.

"Yuck! Why keep them in here, they smell," Rachel pinched her nose between her forefinger and thumb, turning away from the wet shoes.

"I don't know Peyton brought them in here,"

"Excuse me! Who?"

"Peyton," Brooke frowned thinking she had spoken clear enough the first time.

"God! You really need to get your head screwed on straight. There is no Peyton, only PeytWhore the girl who stole your boyfriend and was a bitch of a best friend."

Brooke nodded sombrely.

"Now by the time I arrive on Friday I expect you to have your mind set straight, and we will talk." Rachel stood and flicked a hand through her hair before leaving.

~O0O~

"Are you going to go in?" Rachel questioned Mouth who was sat on a plastic blue chair outside of Brooke's room.

Mouth stayed silent.

"Oh come on McFadden, you've been in her room every day whilst she was comatose, you fucking rescued her from drowning and now you haven't got the balls to go in?"

Mouth was about to speak but was interrupted by a nurse in blue scrubs calling out to them that visiting hours were over and they had to leave.

"You will see her tomorrow," Rachel instructed and the two left the hospital side by side.

~O0O~

Brooke hated night-time. Every night whilst she had been a child had been spent sitting outside on the porch step, waiting for the shouting to finish and for her mother and father to depart to their separate rooms, allowing Brooke a safe route through to her bedroom.

It was either that or being holed up under her bed, a pillow over her head, a torch in hand and a duvet over her shivering frame.

But she had been used to that, the noise, the light. Now she was in a dark room all on her own. All alone.

Brooke didn't dare close her eyes, for although she knew there was no such thing as the boogie monster nor would a kidnapper be at her door she was still afraid of things creeping up on her during the night. Memories, they came creeping, like nightmares. Forcing her to remember, she was never allowed to forget. Never. They let her know that she was still alone, that the others had each other and that at all the major points in her life she had been alone. At least apart from Peyton, but she hadn't turned out to be the great friend Brooke had thought her to be

So now as Brooke watched the shadowy walls close in on her she could picture twisty vines reaching up to grab her. She flinched and winced as she scratched her arm, frantically trying to wake herself up. But she was already awake.

Brooke began clawing at her skin, screeches sounding out of her mouth.

They were coming for her. They wanted to make her remember.

Remember that her parents didn't care, that they never cared.

Remember that her first boyfriend had broken her heart twice.

Remember that her ex-boyfriend had always wanted Peyton more than her.

Remember that Peyton was loved and that she always got what she wanted.

Remember how Peyton had screwed her over, so many times now.

Remember that Nathan had Haley and Haley had Nathan.

Remember that although Rachel was alone, her parents cared, they checked up on her.

Remember that Mouth he couldn't bear the stress of her problems, he had his own to deal with.

Remember that she was dying, slowly and surely she was dying.

She was dying. Brooke let out an animalistic scream and watched as her skin fell off, revealing blood red scratches.

The door burst open and light flood in to the room, rendering Brooke a scared helpless girl in the eyes of the paramedics.

"Brooke?" Chase headed the front of the nurses and his gaze fell on to the girl who sat straight up in bed wailing.

Dashing to her side, he was met with deep scratches all over her skin, bleeding profusely.

"Ok, I'll need a stitches kit and a lot of plasters," Chase addressed the paramedics, who swiftly left the room, letting the door swing to.

"It's too dark," Brooke whimpered as the room delved in to darkness.

"Hush, is that ok?" Chase walked calmly over to the light switched and flicked it allowing him to sweep his eyes over all of the damage done.

"Brooke, what happened? Why were you scratching yourself?" Chase let the weak girl fall in to his arms and sob against his chest. All he could make out were the words _alone_, _shadows_ and _remember_.

"Brooke, please look at me, right now you need to focus on getting better and doing this to yourself isn't going to help."

As he looked in to her hazel orbs, Chase could tell her terror went beyond her fear of dying and that she had been traumatised long ago. Left deeply scarred by several beings.

"Chase don't leave me," Brooke latched on to the front of his crisp white shirt, her pleas desperate.

"I won't, settle down now," Chase was handed a sewing kit and a tub of plasters and antiseptic and he carefully untangled Brooke's fingers in order to get to work on her wounds.

Her cuts ran deep along her arms and legs and several were in need of being stitched. By the time he was done Chase was covered in more blood than Brooke and needed to clean up.

"Don't go!" Brooke detached her IV in her efforts to reach Chase who had begun to walk away.

"Brooke, don't do that!" Chase rushed to the brunette's side and manoeuvred her back in to bed, attaching the IV back in to place.

"You said you wouldn't leave," She pummelled her doctor with her fists.

"I need to clean up, I'll be in that room next door, washing myself." Chase pointed to the adjoining bathroom.

"Come straight back," Brooke relented watching as her oncologist disappeared in to the room.

Five minutes had passed and Brooke found herself panicking again. She was alone, Chase wasn't coming back and she would have to remember.

"Chase!" Her calls we wild and Chase came running back in fearing the worst.

His shirt was not fully buttoned up and he blushed as Brooke caught sight of his tanned chest.

"What's wrong?"

"You left me," Brooke pouted and Chase sighed.

"Brooke I was in the next room, now are you going to tell me why you don't want to be alone." He buttoned up his shirt and approached the bed, kneeling down next to it.

Brooke shook her head and her doctor frowned.

"I can't," She tried to explain and watched as her Chase's eyebrows furrowed together.

"Brooke—"

"It's silly," Brooke pouted as Chase attempted to get the answer out of her.

"And I'm tired," She stretched out her arms and lay her head down on the pillow.

"Fine there will be no more discussion tonight but tomorrow Brooke we will talk,"

Chase left the bed to grab a spare blanket and pillow from a cupboard in the corner of the room and spread his make-shift bed next to Brooke's.

He made to go and turn the light off but Brooke stopped him.

"Please don't," She pleaded and so Chase left the light on and rolled over in his bed, laying his head down too.

"Goodnight Brooke," He gave her a sweet smile before falling asleep.

"Night Chase," Her words were muffled by her pillow but she was sure Chase had heard her.

~O0O~

"What happened?" Haley panicked seeing Brooke's plastered arms and legs, the white duvet having rolled off of the sleeping figure.

"Could you two step out for a little while," Brooke's doctor appeared behind the two visitors, beckoning them outside, they followed eagerly, hoping for answers to Brooke's obvious injuries.

Chase led them down the hallway and in to his office, sitting himself down on his plush 'doctors' chair.

"What happened to Brooke?" Haley asked as she and Nathan sat themselves down on the two red leather chairs across the desk from the doctor.

"Well that's what I thought you two might be able to help me with. Late last night a nurse on the night shift informed me that one of my wards was screeching and wailing like a banshee. With a few other nurses I investigated the noise and found Brooke sitting up in bed, scratching herself to pieces and wailing miserably. When I tried to get the reason for her screaming she fell in to my arms murmuring about being alone, shadows, remembering and the fact it was too dark. Later she wouldn't let me leave and so I spent the night in her hospital room. I was hoping you'd be able to help me with the reason Brooke was like that last night."

Chase looked to the two teenagers hopefully as he opened up a brown file Haley presumed to be Brooke's

"Brooke's never liked the dark," Haley informed the doctor, refreshing her memories of being Brooke's room-mate.

"She hates being alone too, especially at night time,"

Chase nodded "I guessed as much, by her reactions last night. Do any of you have any ideas as to where this has stemmed from? The source of Brooke's supposed mild monophobia." He inquired looking at the two married couple intently

"Her parents maybe," Nathan suggested.

"Why her parents?"

"They neglected her, they weren't really parents material," Nathan recalled nights when Brooke had crept in to his bedroom, too afraid to be at her own for fear of getting the brunt of her parents anger.

"Hmm, well thank you for this, I will be speaking with Brooke later, trying to get her own views out of it but if you could help her by making her feel less lonely then we may be able to cure Brooke of her loneliness," Chase smiled at the two and stood up, ready to leave.

"Wait! You're Brooke's oncologist right?" Haley stopped the doctor from ushering them out.

"Yes, do you have questions regarding Brooke's cancer?"

"Yes! Well sort of, we were wondering how we could help?"

"You are Brooke's best friends correct?"

"Yeah," Nathan answered, standing up beside Haley and letting her slender hand fit in to his.

"Well then that's all you need to do. As long as you are Brooke's best friends and she knows you're here for her, then you are doing everything you can. Come to her appointments, convince her that she can fight. Be strong beside her and don't break down. Because if you are strong then so is Brooke," Chase opened the door and the three exited the office.

"Oh and visiting hours for Brooke have been bumped seeing as she is very tired, however you will be able to see her when she is discharged tomorrow."

"Oh ok,"

"Goodbye now, I expect to see your faces around here more often."

"Of course," Haley promised and they wondered back down the hallway and out of the hospital.

~O0O~

"Thank you for staying with me Chase," Brooke thanked her doctor who had stayed with her the Thursday night as well, just as a precautionary.

"You're welcome Brooke, now stay here until your friends come to pick you and, you are officially discharged but you are not allowed to leave this wheelchair until you are outside of the hospital, is that clear."

"Fine," Brooke grumbled, and Chase laughed.

"No-one ever seems to like the wheelchairs, I wonder why?" He mused.

"Because they're constricting, once you get of the hospital you want to be able to walk to prove you are better and to stretch your limbs. Wheelchairs confine you," Brooke explained and Chase nodded.

"Well I will leave you now in your confining wheelchair your friends should be here soon, I do not expect you to be here before Monday do I make myself clear,"

"Yes Sir, I will not be here before 11 on Monday," Brooke saluted her doctor mockingly as he left the room.

"I mean it Brooklyn!" Chase told her sternly.

Now that Chase had gone, Brooke was bored. Chase had discharged her an hour early due to having important work to get to and so Rachel wouldn't be picking her up till 12.

Deciding that she might as well put her wheelchair to good use, Brooke rolled out in to the vacant hallway.

_Let's see how first this baby can go _Brooke thought, checking once more to make sure the hallway was empty.

With a loud 'Whee' Brooke zoomed along to the end of the corridor, giggling madly.

She spun round and sped back the other way squealing like a pig.

On her third streak Brooke found herself startled by a black camera lens being brought out of contact with her face.

"Mad skills you got there," The voice was deep and Brooke could tell instantly that it was a male.

Wheeling back, Brooke found herself face to face with a smiling curly haired male whose grin was a little lopsided.

"Um, thanks," She grinned back at the mysterious boy his smile infectious.

"Do you mind if I film you doing that?"

"Who are you?" Brooke asked deciding to put it bluntly.

"Oh yeah, I'm Julian, Julian Baker," The boy rubbed the back of his head nervously before holding out his hand for Brooke to shake.

"Hi, Julian Baker, I'm Brooke Davis," She smiled at him; a real smile and was delighted to see him respond.

"Well seeing as we're both acquainted, I was wondering if you'd like to wheel down the hallway and I could film you,"

"Sure, why not Julian Baker,"

Brooke swivelled round and wheeled herself to the end of the hallway.

"Are you ready?" She called down to Julian who's gave her the thumbs up, his head behind his black video camera.

Brooke rocketed down the hallway at top speed, her hands in the air and a wide grin on her face.

She was out of breath as she reached the end and Julian put his foot out to stop the wheelchair from hurtling in to the dead end.

"That was exhilarating," Brooke breathed and Julian put his camera lens down to high-five the brunette.

"So are you a visitor," Brooke asked, realising that Julian was in the oncology ward.

"Sort of," Julian told her, opening up his leather satchel to store his video camera.

"What does sort of mean?" Brooke questioned inquisitively.

"Have you got any time, or do you have to leave now," Julian peered down at his watch noting the time as 11:10

"I've got time, my friends aren't coming to pick me up till 12," Brooke informed the brown haired boy.

"Well then would you care to join me for an early lunch Miss Davis?" Julian ran round to the back of Brooke's wheelchair, grabbing the handles.

"I would love to Mr Baker," The two set off towards the hospital cafeteria.

~O0O~

"Where is Brooke," Rachel exited Brooke's deserted hospital room to face Peyton, Lucas, Haley and Nathan (Mouth had refused to come).

"You mean she isn't in there?"

"Well obviously Goldilocks," Rachel groaned at the blonde's question.

"Well where is she then?"

"Do I look like I have a fucking clue," Rachel snapped and Peyton backed in to Lucas.

"There's no need to use that tone," Lucas warned Rachel.

"Lucas fucking Scott, to the rescue again. Well Lucas you're not my dad so shut up!" Rachel clapped her hands over her head as her migraine pounded. Staying up late last night was not a good idea. Or early in that matter.

"Partied too hard?" Peyton grumbled underneath her breath, still annoyed that Rachel had taken her place as Brooke's designated best friend.

"I never party too hard, now can we focus on finding Brooke," Rachel flashed Peyton a smirk before heading off down the hallway.

~O0O~

"Wow, so you're in remission?" Brooke looked to Julian who nodded in agreement.

"Yep, been through it twice and now I've finally hit the five year mark."

"God you're so brave, and strong," Brooke looked down to find her hand clasped with Julian's.

"Oh I'm sorry," She blushed realising it had happened during the story.

"It's alright," Julian's sweet honey breath washed over her face as he kept their hands tight together.

"I'm scared," Brooke admitted, feeling that she could tell Julian, after all he had been through it twice and survived.

"It's ok to be scared Brooke, in fact you're being strong by admitting that," Julian gripped Brooke's hand tighter.

"I just feel I can tell you that because you understand," Brooke told him.

"I get that, sometimes it's easier telling someone who's going through the same thing or who's been through the same thing."

"Did you have that someone?" Brooke queried.

"I did," Julian's voice tightened a little bit with emotion and Brooke wondered if she had gone too far.

"You don't have to talk about—"

"It's alright…his name was Owen, he had leukaemia like me but…he…he didn't make it," Julian's voice cracked and Brooke leaned over the table to hug, her heart strings twanging.

"Brooke!" Brooke's head snapped to attention after hearing Rachel calling her.

Still hugging Julian, Brooke turned to see her friends standing there, staring at the two teens.

"Oh, hey guys," Brooke loosened her hold on the boy and pulled them both up.

"Who's this Brooke?" Rachel eyed Julian who had now recovered from his small breakdown earlier.

"Just a friend," Brooke waved her hand airily, noticing Lucas clear jealousness.

"Just a friend huh?" Lucas eyes had darkened.

"God Lucas, yes, and what do you care?" Brooke glared at the blonde haired boy who cooled down considerably.

"You're right, what do I care." He shoved off Peyton's hold and stalked out of the cafeteria.

"I'll go," Haley ran off after her best friend. They were in need of some Haley and Lucas time.

"So where'd you meet Julian?" Peyton inquired her eyebrows raising at the sight of Brooke's hand entwined with Julian's

"Around," Brooke shrugged, not wanting for everyone to know of her childish moment.

"Oh come on Brooke, tell your friend the truth,"

All eyes were on Brooke at the mention of friend.

"Mr Baker are you insisting that I tell them of the moment we met?" Brooke kinked an eyebrow, ignoring the friend comment.

"Why yes Miss Davis, I am,"

"Very well," Brooke sighed dramatically.

"I was in the toilet, washing my hands when low and behold Julian walks in. I asked him if he was confused about his sexuality and he insisted that he was a male and in the men's toilets, so I took him outside to point out the differences between the stick figures and when he still didn't get it I decided to sit him down and explain them to him properly."

Julian spluttered at the explanation, clearly not expecting that whilst the rest of them chuckled.

"Oh is something wrong Julian, confused between your lung pipe and your oesophagus?" Brooke questioned.

"Wow Brooke, you know big words?" Nathan winked at the brunette who's cherry red lips stretched in to a smile.

"Everyone knows their food pipe Nathan, even you!"

"Brooke Davis, that was such a lie! And you know it" Julian gave a playful frown at the brunette who giggled.

"Yeah I know, but it made a good story,"

"So how did you two meet?" Nathan asked.

"Now that is a great story, that I would love to tell you," Julian beamed, his chance to tell a fantastic story.

"Now be truthful Julian," Brooke wagged a finger at him.

"Oh don't worry Brooke, _I_ will. Hmm, ok, so I was casually walking down the oncology ward on my way out of the hospital when I hear someone crying for help. Being the gentlemen that I am I follow the source of the noise, only to discover Miss Davis here sprawled out underneath the bed. She informed me that she was stuck, having tangled herself up in the sheets. Before I pulled her out I asked her what she was doing and she informed me that she was cleansing her spirit of bad karma and to do so she had to vanquish all of the monsters hiding underneath her bed. Deciding that she was dehydrated and hadn't eaten in a while I took her to the cafeteria to discuss her absurd idea further."

Julian grinned delightedly at Brooke's amused expression.

"That's so not true!" She squealed, punching Julian's side.

"Brooke has too much bad karma and she was obviously doing something kinky underneath the bed that she didn't want Mr McHottie over here to know about." Rachel licked her lips saucily.

"Well it's very obvious that both of those are made up stories, so I'm not going to bother asking again, can we please go, hospitals still give me the creeps." Peyton shivered and Nathan put a hand out to steady the blonde.

"Good, I want to get out of this wheelchair," Brooke kicked the footstep of her chair and grumbled loudly.

"Aw I thought you loved your wheelchair?" Julian nudged Brooke who gave him a playful frown.

"Shut up film geek,"

The five of them walked slowly to the entrance, or in Brooke's case rolled slowly to the entrance where they met up with Lucas and Haley.

"He calmed down now?" Nathan asked his wife after eying the rather moody male.

Haley didn't answer but made a half and half sign with her hands.

"I can see your actions Haley, they're not invisible," The broody blonde's eyebrows knitted together as he took in Brooke and Julian's hands.

"No you can't, you can't see anything I'm doing," Haley argued joining Nathan's side as she waved her hands above her face, as if trying to be invisible.

"As much as I'd love to re-visit my childhood again can we please leave," Rachel spoke up, their banter not amusing her.

"Do you need a ride, because I would love to kick two certain blondes out?" Rachel looked to Julian who shook his head.

"I'm fine, but I guess I'll see you guys around."

"Are you going to Tree Hill High?" Haley questioned, thinking it was a little too late in the year to transfer.

"No, I'm at UNCW studying as a freshman,"

"Studying what?" Peyton inquired nosily.

" Film,"

"Stop grilling him guys, can we go?

"Thank God, someone who also thinks hanging around a hospital is boring," Rachel pushed open the front doors and headed outside.

"I guess that's my cue to go, you've got my number right?" Julian looked to Brooke who waved her phone in the air, signalling that she had it.

"And you'll be there on Monday?"

"Wouldn't miss it," Julian waved to the others and sauntered off outside, heading to his car.

"Good he's gone," Lucas muttered as they all stepped in to the glare of the sun.

"Oh shut up," Nathan wacked his brother round his head tired of his whining.

"You feeling ok Brooke?" Haley realised she hadn't checked in on her friend yet.

"Yeah, I'm fine Haley, stop babying me!" Brooke flapped her hands, waving her friends away as they arrived at Rachel's car.

"Ok, now Haley you're gonna have to sit on your hubbie's lap because I don't have enough room and I don't want to see the two blonde idiots get involved in foreplay,"

Peyton snarled a little at Rachel's remark.

"I wasn't aware some of us were animals, Back away I don't want to catch rabies,"

Brooke snickered a little at Rachel's comment but was more fixated on getting out of the wheelchair.

"Hot shot! Come over here and get me out!" Nathan happily complied as he heaved Brooke's petite frame out of her wheelchair.

"Ouch!"

"Oh I'm sorry did I hurt you?" Nathan checked Brooke's plasters, well aware that she was still in pain.

"You're stepping on my foot!" Brooke huffed, pointing down to where Nathan's size 9's were stepping on Brooke's small 5's .

"Oops sorry!"

"Haley you can keep Mr Big Feet, he's too clumsy," Brooke frowned as she reached down to rub her sore foot.

"I'll happily have him," Haley gave her husband a gooey look as they climbed inside of Rachel's car.

"Ugh!" Rachel mimed vomiting as she waited for Brooke to jump in to the front seat.

As they set off, Brooke shut her eyes even though Chase had been with her last night she still hadn't gotten much sleep.

~O0O~

"Why are we still driving?" Brooke stretched out in her seat as she looked around at the scenery they were passing.

"Welcome back snorer,"

Brooke reached up to sort out her wig, that had been knocked aside a little during her sleep, hoping no-one had noticed. Even though they all knew about her…tumour they had yet to find out she had lost all of her hair and Brooke didn't want to tell them.

"Where are we?" Brooke didn't recognise the familiar surroundings of Tree Hill, instead they seemed to be driving through a forest; thick leafy green trees brushed against the car as they drove past the thick oak trunks.

"Well we're not in Tree Hill," Nathan confirmed Brooke's suspicions.

"Will someone just tell me what's going on!" Brooke felt bile rising up in her throat and recalled that she hadn't taken her pills yet.

"I think I'm going to vomit! Stop the car!" She ordered Rachel who immediately braked and the six were flung forward

"Get out of the car Bitch!" Rachel leant over to push open Brooke's car door and almost shoved her out.

Brooke lurched in to the overgrowth and violently threw up in to the bushes, the noises travelling back to the passengers.

"Isn't anyone going to help her?" Haley flung open her door, tissues at the ready as she ran off to find Brooke.

Peyton too opened her door but was stopped by Rachel.

"Best friends only," She scowled at the blonde and switched on child lock, laughing as Peyton grasped a hold of the door handle but was unable to open it.

~O0O~

"Here you go," Haley handed Brooke a tissue to mop her face.

"I'm sorry," A few tears slid down Brooke's rosy red cheeks and Haley hugged her friend hard, leading her away from her vomit.

"Don't be Brooke, it isn't your fault, none of this is." Haley kept a fierce hold on her best friend as she wiped the rest of her face.

"Thanks Hales, you're always here for me."

"I think you've got it the other way around but what does it matter. I will always be here for you. You've done so much for me Brooke."

"Most of the stuff I owed you Haley, tit for tat."

"You did it anyway, you didn't have to but you did. Because you Brooke Davis have the biggest heart out of everyone. You are going to beat this cancer. You are strong and I love you so much. You are not going anywhere. Fuck Cancer, say it with me Fuck you Cancer!"

"You swore!" A giggle escaped Brooke's cherry red lips and Haley laughed too.

"I guess I did, now you say it!"

"Fuck Cancer, Fuck it, Fuck it!" Brooke chanted and Haley joined in.

"You ready to go back now?" Haley asked Brooke who nodded.

"Hell Yeah! Fuck Cancer!" The two laughed and made their way back past the trees and plants.

~O0O~

"You ready to go now?" Rachel asked Brooke who swung herself up in to the front seat.

"Yeah, I'm ready, where are we going anyway?"

"Back to my cabin!"

"What! But I have my appointment…"

"Don't worry, we leave Sunday evening, we've got schools anyway,"

"So we're going back to your cabin?"

"Uh uh, that's what I just said Slut!"

"Shut up Whore!"

"Let's go have some fun!"

"As long as it doesn't involve your Fatass in a bikini!"

"Hey that's my line!"

"Can we please just go?" Lucas sighed.

"Hell Yeah!"


	10. The Fine Art Of Sharing Secrets

Chapter Eight- The Fine Art Of Sharing Deadly Secrets

**_"Secrets. Funny how, when you're about to be given something precious, something you've wanted for a long time, you suddenly feel nervous over taking it.  
Everyone wants more than anything to be allowed into someone else's most secret self. Everyone wants to allow someone into their most secret self. Everyone feels so alone inside that their deepest wish is for someone to know their secret being, because then they are alone no longer. Don't we all long for this? Yet when it's offered it's frightening, because you might not live up to the desires of the one who bestows the gift. And frightening because you know that accepting such a gift means you'll want-perhaps be expected- to offer a similar gift in return. Which means giving your *self* away. And what's more frightening than that?"_**** Aidan Chambers **

Brooke sprawled out on the silk bedspread, her head pounding with the memories of the cabin. Rachel had allowed her to choose the first bedroom and although she her heart had ached for her to choose the room she had once shared with her boyfriend her head knew that she couldn't handle it.

"Brooke, are you coming out? Lucas made lunch," Haley knocked at the door to Brooke's room, awaiting an answer.

Brooke rolled over, on to her side, clutching her stomach as she felt the familiar pains. "I'm fine Haley, I already had lunch," She called back, waiting for Haley to walk away before slipping out the room to fetch her pills.

"Alright, but you will eat something later," Haley's maternal instincts kicked in and she stayed by the room for a few minutes before heading back to the kitchen.

After she could no longer hear Haley's footsteps, Brooke slipped off of the bed and grasped the handle of the door quietly, making sure it didn't make a noise as she opened it.

All in all, Brooke was happy for the trip away, but what she hadn't accounted for was that they were all together for two nights, alone and with issues to talk about. Issues she wasn't ready to talk about.

Creeping softly down the hall-way, Brooke stopped by the bathroom and turned the handle, ready to enter. However a laugh stopped her. In fact several laughs stopped her; Loud belly-laughs that shook the structure of the house with their rumbles.

Brooke wasn't jealous but she decided to investigate what was happening in the dining room. She hadn't laughed in a long time, let alone a raucous belly-laugh.

Envy hit her in waves as she approached the end of the hall. Flattening herself against the wall, Brooke peered round the wall, catching sight of a few heads.

Currently all she could see was Haley; she was sitting at the table her fair locks framing her face as she looked down at the ground, it was clear (even from Brooke's distance) that she was blushing, as a rosy pink tinge slowly faded from her neck.

_'What did they do to embarrass Haley_?' Brooke craned her head slightly trying to see more, but hands on her shoulders make her shriek and her cover was blown.

"Well, well what do we have here?" The hands, marched her forward and from the sharp red claws digging in to her shoulders Brooke could tell it was Rachel.

"Ouch!" Brooke wiggled under Rachel's grip, feeling bruises coming on.

"Is it, I think it is a rare Brooke Davis bird." Peyton joked playing on.

Brooke hung her head as she felt the weight of her audience's stares on her; So much for _'staying hidden'_.

"Hey Brookie, I made omelette's," Luke waved a plate of hot cheesy omelette in front of her and watched as she crumbled.

Grabbing a hold of the hot plate, Brooke sat herself down at the table, digging in to the home-cooked meal. The others followed suit and soon the only sound was of cutlery scraping against plates and mouths chewing.

"Thanks," Brooke addressed Lucas as she brought her plate up to the sink and placed it in the warm washing up water to soak.

"You're welcome, so are you going to join us?"

Brooke raised an eyebrow not too sure about what he was talking about. Whatever it was she was probably going to decline anyway, feeling drowsy and a little sick after stuffing herself.

"We're um, watching a movie," Brooke watched Lucas stumble over his words and giggled to herself. It was cute. Lucas was cute. That was the problem.

"Sorry Luke, I feel a little tired, I think I'm going to go lay down," Brooke gestured to her room and turning around was about to head off but a soft hand clutching her wrist halted her steps.

"Please come, you can lay on me if you'd like, just like we used to, if you're tired."

Brooke stared in to Lucas's pleading blue eyes and felt drained of all her energy. Since when did rejecting become so hard? _'Since you met a certain blonde haired, blue eyed boy'_

"Lucas, I'm…" Brooke didn't know what to say, she felt as if she was going to collapse in to his arms then and there. She wanted to.

"Please, then after you can go and lay down, please Brooke. I know I haven't been a great friend lately, but I want to change that," Lucas was practically begging.

"You want to be friends?" Brooke's eyebrows shot up, not used to the term coming out of Lucas's mouth. When had they ever been _'just friends_?

Lucas paused before answering Brooke's question," If that's what you want, then yeah, I want to be friends."

"Alright," Lucas reached a hand out to Brooke unsure as to where they stood on the friendship scale yet.

Brooke however didn't hesitate to pull Lucas in to a hug, wrapping her slender arms tightly around his neck and playing with the strands of his hair.

Lucas breathed in deeply, inhaling the sweet scent of Brooke, cherry blossom and vanilla.

"You need to get a hair-cut," Brooke murmured in to his ear, as she let go of the blonde strands and stepped out of his arms.

"I'll make you a deal, if you stay and watch the movie, I'll get a hair-cut," Lucas compromised, wanting nothing more than to wrap his arms around Brooke as she cuddled up to him on the couch.

"Can I cut it?" Brooke's face brightened up at this remark and her expression became hopeful.

"Um, er, well I think it'll be better if I get it down by, um, professionals, don't want to be looking bad beside you,"

"You think I cut hair badly?" Brooke's expression dimmed and hurt was written clearly across her face.

"No! God, no Brooke don't cry, I didn't mean that."

"Does that mean I can cut it?" Brooke's smile re-appeared and Lucas decided that making her happy would be the best choice.

"Yeah, Brooke you can cut it," He surrendered.

"Can we do it now?" Brooke clapped her hands together excitedly.

"You said you'd watch the movie remember," Lucas reminded Brooke of his compromise.

"What? I never…oh, yeah I suppose I did, do I have to…really?"

"Yes, really, come on it will be fun! The girls are picking the movie." Haley bounded up to Brooke having been waiting patiently for the two to finish their conversation.

"Really? I guess I'm in then," Brooke let Haley lead her away, the arms linked, chatting happily amongst themselves.

Lucas loped over to his brother, who had a gooey look on his face. "Seriously, the girls get to choose?" he chided him.

"We're outnumbered brother, four to two, and beside Haley is just too irresistible, the way her pouty lips are so soft and supp—"

"—Ew, brother that's my best friend you're talking about!"

"Well she's my wife!" Nathan retorted, joining the girls in the living room.

He immediately, caught his wife in a hug and she squealed happily as they eased down on to a sofa, limbs entangled.

Lucas looked at the remaining options to sit down; there was a large red arm-chair, another sofa and a love-seat.

"I'm taking the chair!" Peyton headed over to the arm-chair and plonked herself down. She was avoiding him, Lucas knew that for sure.

"Well then I guess I'll sit here," Brooke curled her legs underneath her as she lay down on the sofa.

Lucas headed over to her, ready to bask in her warmth, but Rachel's nails stopped him.

"You're sitting with me," She grinned viciously, pulling him down on to the love-seat.

"Hey! But…" Lucas protested, but Rachel dug her claws in tightly.

"Nu-uh, lover boy you're sitting with me," She smirked smugly as he obeyed and released her grip, letting him sink deeper in the chair.

"So what are we watching?" Lucas asked, praying that it was nothing that could worsen the day.

"Well, there's a choice," Haley beamed, holding up three DVDs'.

"What have you got?" Peyton asked, leaning forward in her chair to scan the DVD's Haley was holding.

"Number 1, is The Vow!" Haley waggled the DVD holding up the cover for everyone to see.

"I love that film," Brooke spoke up from her place on the couch, snuggled deep under two thick blankets.

"Are you cold Brooke?" Nathan asked worriedly realising that it was almost summer-time.

"Only a little, nothing to worry about," Brooke's smiled at us all, convincing us she was fine.

"Just shout if you need anything," Lucas called over to her, as she lay her head down on a mountain of pillows. She had tried to tell him she was tired and he hadn't listened. Of course she was tired. _She was sick!_

"I'm fine, really," Brooke burrowed deeper as Haley announced the next film.

"The second is Legally Blonde," Haley waved the movie in the air.

"Discrimination against Red-heads!" Rachel cried out.

"Shut-up, you're a natural brunette!" Brooke responded

"Moving on, the last DVD is a favourite of us all, A Walk To Remember!"

Underneath the blankets, Brooke froze, her body went rigid and her hands gripped the edge of her covers tightly.

"Brooke are you alright?" Lucas asked, wondering if she was feeling sick.

"Fine, just excuse me please," Brooke stood up, her body straight and walked out of the room, her movement's soldier like.

"Is it more of her symptoms?" Haley looked to Lucas, wondering if he knew the answer.

He shrugged and was about to go and follow the brunette, but Rachel stopped him

"Let me go," She pushed Lucas back down on the couch and ran out of the room.

~O0O~

"Brooke, are you alright?" Rachel knocked on the door to the bathroom, hearing sounds that sounded a lot like vomiting.

There was silence and Rachel rattled the door handle again.

"Brooke, answer me? I may not want to know what sluttish things you're doing in there, but I do want to know your ok."

The door flung open, "If it's anyone doing whorish things, it's you biatch."

She held a smile on her face, but her colouring was all wrong; pale with a sickly greenish yellow tinge.

"As f I didn't catch you 'brooking' yourself last time you were here." Rachel retaliated, and Brooke flushed, a rare thing for her to do.

"So, are you ok?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" Brooke looked at Rachel, feigning confusion.

"Because you just threw up in there," The fake red-head pointed back to the toilet.

"Just an added bonus with the….." Brooke didn't say the word but saw Rachel nodding and knew she understood.

"Yeah, but that wasn't the reason, was it?" Rachel's eyes narrowed as Brooke looked up surprised.

"I saw your face when wifey told you about the last film, and I know why,"

Brooke looked down, "Do you think I'm being wimpy?"

"Wimpy? Brooke you have cancer, it makes sense that you don't want to watch a film where a girl around your age dies of cancer. Brooke I understand and they will too. No matter how annoying, immature and whiny that bunch are they will take care of you and they will understand. So get your arse back in there before I kick it!"

Rachel shoved Brooke, softly though, reminded that she was still fragile from the vomiting incident only a mere few minutes before.

~O0O~

"Are you ok?" Peyton questioned Brooke as she re-entered the living room and sat down on her couch.

"Fine," Brooke nodded her head, using the fake wig to hide her face.

"So what film do you want to watch, I personally think A Walk To Remember is the best choice," Peyton persisted in her questioning.

Rachel nudged Brooke, urging her to speak up.

Drawing in confidence, Brooke straightened up, "Actually would you mind if we didn't, I mean watch that film."

"Why? It's your favourite Brooke?"

"Used to be," Brooke muttered her eyes never looking at the plastic DVD case lying on the table.

"Brooke, you can tell us," Haley's orbs met Brooke's encouraging her to share.

"It's just, she has, you know and she you know." Brooke said softly, as the others craned to her.

"No, we don't know," Peyton joked but Rachel shut her up with a glare.

"She has, s-she h-has, c-c-c-cancer," Brooke stuttered,"

"Brooke! I am so sorry," Haley shot out of her chair, rushing to give Brooke a hug as her stupidity kicked in.

"I don't know what I was thinking, we can watch Legally Blonde eh, or maybe The Vow?"

"Thanks TutorGirl," Brooke's arms left Haley's as the girl returned to her seat.

"I honestly forgot," Peyton leant over to Brooke to give her a hug too and the vulnerable brunette let the blonde wrap her skinny arms around her.

"Can we choose the movie now?" Nathan cried impatiently, noticing that Brooke's expression as the blonde clung on for a little longer that usual.

"Brooke, your choice?" Haley looked to the brunette who in return grinned impishly and shouted "Legally Blonde!" Haley smiled at her and knelt down to place the DVD in to the player, turning on the t-v as she did so.

For the rest of the film, it was as if nothing had ever changed but it had and everyone felt the air shift a little as the credits came to an end.

"Well that was good," Lucas broke the silence and his brother gave him a horrified look.

"Seriously dude? Are you kidding me right now?"

"Ok, so maybe it wasn't that good, but the girls enjoyed it," Lucas crept a glance over at Brooke who had fallen asleep half-way during the movie and was now napping peacefully, her chest rising and falling slowly.

"Well at least some of the girls."

"So, what should we do now?" Peyton asked the group and the room once again descended in to quietude.

"Oh, come on guys, can we just remove the elephant in the room, wake up Brooke and talk about what is bothering us all. Brooke has freaking Cancer!"

Rachel stood, hand on her cocked hip, her cobalt blue eyes flashing.

"We can't wake her up, she's tired." Lucas stated and Rachel fixated her eyes on him.

"She's always gonna be tired Luke and we might as well get this over and done with, I'm tired of people pretending everything is ok. Because it's not! It's not okay."

Nathan admired the red-head's guts, for saying the words everyone was thinking and being there for Brooke when they weren't. However he still didn't agree with waking Brooke up.

"Rache, she has radiation in three days and she's tired. She needs to catch up on her sleep, her doctor says she hasn't been sleeping properly the last few days." Nathan reached out a hand to Rachel to calm her down but she shoved it away angrily.

"You are such a bunch of pussies. I don't care whether Brooke is tired right now because we need answers and we are damn sure gonna get them. We have been waiting long enough." She stomped her to Brooke, her high-heels sinking in to the carpet.

"Wake up!" She touched Brooke's shoulder and the girl woke up with a start.

"Rache go away," The girl moaned quietly, her eyes fluttering open for a mere second.

"Get up," Rachel rubbed her shoulder again and Brooke's eyes opened once more.

"Leave me Whore."

"No, get up,"

"Fine, what is it?" Brooke grumbled, positioning herself up on the cushion before taking in the eyes of her friends.

"Oh, crap, did I miss the movie?" She questioned, glancing at the blank screen and realising she was right.

"It's ok, Brookie you were tired, you go back to sleep." Haley's voice was silk softly crooning to Brooke who felt her heavy lids shutting.

"Haley!" Rachel's voice was lower as she snapped at the girl before lightly shoving Brooke's shoulder.

"What!"

"We want to talk!" Rachel helped Brooke re-settle herself as she crouched down beside the sofa.

"About what?" Brooke asked irritably.

"About you having cancer."Rachel spoke the words simply enough but they hit Brooke like a freight train and her pulse accelerated, her breaths shorter and faster.

"She's not ready," Lucas's eyes grew wide at his ex-girlfriends reaction and wanted more than anything to sooth her.

"She's fine…she's tougher than you guys give her credit for." Rachel replied softly and the others watched as Brooke slowly calmed herself down.

"So," the red head tried again.

"So what?"

"Brooke, stop being difficult!" Rachel groaned, her temper level rising again.

"Why do you want to know?" Brooke sighed exasperatedly, wishing she could put this conversation off to…never.

"Because we're your friends, Brooke and we want to help you," Peyton joined in the conversation.

"I thought we talked about this goldilocks? We're not friends anymore!" Brooke glared at the blonde who shrunk back in her seat.

"Peyton's just trying to help you Brooke, we all her," Haley soothed sweetly, from her place opposite Brooke.

"I don't need your help, I know what I need to do, and I'm doing it." Brooke shrugged as if that was the end of the conversation but Nathan spoke up.

"But don't you want someone to hold your hand whilst you go through your treatments and tell you everything's going to be ok? Don't you want someone to be there with you and for you? Don't you want to be able to share how your feeling and what you're doing with your best friends? Brooke we're here for you, we will always be here for you and if you're not going to let us in we're going to keep banging down the door until you do, because that is unacceptable, Brooke Penelope Davis."

Brooke's body shuddered as Nathan's words rang inside her head.

"I have medulloblastoma cancer which is a brain tumour." These were the first words spoken by Brooke about her illness.

After this the words poured out, as Brooke informed the group all about her disease, telling them what was to be expected and what it would mean if she were cured.

"But how are you feeling Brooke?" Lucas eyed the usually cheery girl.

"I'm coping," She did a famous Brooke Davis shrug which Rachel wouldn't fall for.

"Coping my ass, Slut!"

"I'm fine really, it's stressful and hard sometimes but I deal. I have been dealing,"

"How long have you known?" Peyton queried, wondering how long she had kept the secret.

"Not long," Brooke shrugged again.

"But when did you have the first scan?"

"The day before your rehearsal dinner," Brooke answered truthfully.

"You were smiling, and laughing before I," Peyton looked lost in thoughts as she re-called the night, her face stricken.

"It's whatever Peyton," She waved away Peyton's badgering thoughts.

"You did that whole play and arranged our wedding, and you knew you were sick!" Haley's face crumpled, as she ran over to Brooke and gave her a hug.

"I'm so sorry." She sobbed in to her shoulder.

"It's okay, TutorGirl, I wasn't sure then,"

"So when did you find out for real?" Haley brought her face back to look at Brooke.

"The day after my birthday,"

"When you were late, and I went on about missing your birthday and you said you didn't want a party. Of course you didn't want a party. Oh God Brooke I'm so sorry. I should've known."

"You didn't have any reason to suspect, Hales, it's cool."

"All this time, all this time you were pretending, so that time when you were with Mouth, it wasn't his uncle was it?"

"No!" Brooke answered truthfully.

"Or that time,"

"Haley just shut-up, I lied to you, ok I get it, stop trying to make me feel guilty, because I don't,"

She threw off her covers and wobbled as she stood but managed to plant both feet firmly on the ground.

"I'm not trying to make you feel guilty Brooke; I just wanted to know—"

"You don't need to know!" Brooke screamed the words and pushed off Rachel's grip on her waist.

"Just leave me alone, all of you!" Tears streamed down the girl's face as she ran from the room.


	11. Chapter 11

Hey guys I know I haven't uploaded in months and I'm sooooo sorry.

My life has been kinda hectic lately with exams and friendships and meltdowns and I'm incredibly sorry, but I promise uploads are coming very soon

Definitely before December 25th, So that's my Christmas present to you guys.

Now if you would like to my creative juices flowing and me love you guys even more I would love it if my favourite readers would check out a few videos I've uploaded of myself singing covers and original songs. I would literally love you guys to infinity and beyond if you would watch even one.

So my YouTube channel is TheJessicaImogen and I'll post the link on my profile, and I promise uploads soon. I'm incredibly sorry for making you wait for so long.


	12. Book Trailer

I Now Have A Book Trailer For An Angel's Kiss Go And Check It Out. The Link Is On My Profile

Or Take The Spaces Out And Copy This - youtu . be/ oa1KQUHexSA


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